Delusional Dissolutions

It's that time of the year again.  It's time to make those New Year's Revolutions.

What?

Oh.  It's not "revolution".

Yeah, good catch. The only thing revolving around here is my head after a bit of wine.  

Let me try again.  

Resolutions.  Goals.  Yeah, that's it. 

They should be SMART goals:

S - Sarcastic

M- Memorable

A - Antagonistic

R - Retarted

T - Tasty

What?

Oh, sorry.  I was hungry.  Maybe "T" shouldn't be for Tasty.  How about Tempting?

Example:   I will win the lottery (sarcastic, memorable, tempting) but will not share any of the winnings with my bloggy buddies (antagonistic).  I will do this by not purchasing a lottery ticket (sarcastic, retarded). 

Pffft.

AnyMeasurableGoal, I hope you had a great Christmas.  Did you have any awkward Christmas moments?  My mom had one when my brother opened a gift.   It was a shirt.  Underneath the shirt was a pair of white silk long johns.  Oops.  Those were for me.  

No.  I will not model them for you.

I hope you have some kind of plans for bringing in the new year.  Me?  Hubby and I hope to have a winey dinner at the house and watch movies. 

SMART - Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-bound.  Go for it.  

H A P P Y   N E W   Y E A R!!!

On the 4th Day of Christmas, The Gift of Song for Thee

I have Jenn over at "Christmas Cabbages" to thank for this post.   I was going to buy more virtual gifts but I noticed my credit card was maxed out.  I'm sure this is because of Hubby's gift purchases for me.

Today, we have a game to play.  It's easy.  Fill in the blanks using the words from Christmas song titles.

There's too much _______ up north and in Europe. Travelers are upset because they may not be _____ for Christmas and that Santa cannot come into ______. There was an incident at the London airport where one stranded traveler punched a guy for singing _____________.

It doesn't feel like Christmas as it has been warm here and it's not because of _____ roasting over an open fire.

It's also allergy season. I resemble poor _____ with the ____ nose but by this weekend I'll be ____ because of colder weather.

When I was a wee tyke, I saw Momma ______ing Santa Claus. I had come downstairs to remind her that I wanted to be a drummer. Momma said a boy played a drum for the baby Jesus in the hangar. (I think Momma meant manger. She'd been drinking). On Christmas, Momma and Daddy disappeared into their bedroom while I watched The Christmas Story. Momma must have been praying because I kept hearing her shout "Jesus". "Howlay", and someone name "Louyah" must have needed a lot of blessing.

I look forward to seeing your answers in the comments.  Feel free to make up something.  The sillier the better.

Also, Evil Twin wanted to let you know that she found the perfect gift for anyone that shares a bed with another person...or a pet:

Save Your Marriage Blanket

MERRY CHRISTMAS!