Monday, December 26, 2011

BAM-BAM Boxing Day!

Ok. I know it's not about boxing but I couldn't resist.  

Hubby, Cat, Evil Twin and I had a nice Christmas.  We are tired from all the preparations and the visiting but we are exhausted from all the EATING!  You've heard the expression "Don't eat until you're full.  Eat until you're tired?"  Well, that's what we did.  Burp.  BURP!

My compliments to the chef.

At one of our gatherings, I channeled Evil Twin and zombied this poor cookie:

Oreo Cat hid from our guests, the Silly Beast.  He's usually very playful but just like a little kid, he got all shy when you wanted him to shine.

I'm sorry I never finished shopping for you guys.  Actually, I never started but a friend of mine found something that would be great for all of you.  Oreo Cat is very pleased with this selection:

Happy Toasting!  That's right.  Some people find Jesus or Mary on their toast.  You will easily spot  a cat on yours, every time!  Watch out for hairballs.

Toast your bread, toast your tootsies, and most of all, toast the New Year.  Remember it may be the last year for life as we know it.   Evil Twin said the world will end in 1982.  I didn't have the heart to tell her that it's actually going to be 1992.  Sheesh.

Hee Hee.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Life as a Cookie - Part Eight

I'm back.  I hope you haven't forgotten me.  I've been filling out quite nicely, eating lots of whatever the silly Humans will give me.  Waddle, waddle. I have toys hidden all over this place, a reasonably clean litter box, and a couple of walking warm spots at my beck and call.  The Humans tell me I have it good.

Hum....I don't think so.  There aren't any mice here.

The Humans have erected some sort of shrine.  It looks like something that should be outside and something I'm sure I must have climbed in a previous life.  The female spent hours decorating my den and put what she called "orny mentz" on the shrine.

Ahem...that's "ornaments", and it's Christmas time.  The humans deck the halls.

Here is their shrine.  It looks like a tree with snow on it.

Whatever.  Those things are shiny and they move.  They must be my toys.  The Humans give me the stink eye if I even think about looking at their shrine.  Pffft.  I will show them.  If it's the last thing I do (and it might be), I vow to destroy that shrine bit by bit while they sleep.

 Now THIS is more like it.  
These decorative critters are closer to my size.
Whoa!  There's my toy mouse on the floor.  Cool!

OK.  Let's move on.  The sleeping conditions around here are pretty darn good.  Thicker and more cuddly cushy things have appeared on my bed and the walking warm spots have grown accustomed to me using their limbs as pillows.   Oh yeah.  They have their own pillows.  I like those, too.  

When the female gets up in the mornings, I'm still cold so I like to stay in the warm place she's abandoned.  Today, she tried to kill me.  I was in my cave and she tried to smother me with the cushy things.  Sigh.  I showed her.  I was a BIG, SCARY, ROARING (ok, squeaking) BEAST reaching my paw out from the cave and swatting her.  

Oreo, she was just trying to make the bed.  She didn't know you remained in the warm place.  You tricked her.
 See.  There's my cave!

The humans have told me that Santa may bring me something for Christmas if I'm a good kitty.

Well, I guess this Santa will have a lighter load around here this year.

"1.00s, 1.50s, 1.75s for the short arms. If you know what I'm talking about, you're probably old, too."

"Boomer brain fog: What was the last, middle, and first part of what you just said to me?"