Monday, October 26, 2009

Tri Baby, Tri!

My very first triathlon is complete. Status: PASS

I'm already planning improvements for next year. Grab some caffeine and let me tell you all about it:

We gathered in the transition area at O'Dark-Thirty before Dawn had even thought about showing her butt crack. This is where were marked for target practice......er....I mean labeled with permanent markers. Yes. I still have the remnants of my race number on both arms and my age on my leg. No, I didn't get any pictures of my arms and legs.

That's my blue bike and the pirate wig is
at the bottom of the pile.

After setting up my bike and organizing my stuff for the race, standing in line to get my timing chip, and a quick pit stop, it was time to start the race.

The first event was
swimming which is by far my weakest event. We had to swim 300 meters in an indoor pool. The lanes were 50 meters long and the course was like a snake. That is, you swim down the lane, cross under the rope and swim up the next lane, etc., until you either drown or finish the course.

OK. OK. There were some cutie lifeguards that looked about 10. They probably wouldn't have let me drown.


The "snake" course allows all swimmers to be going the same direction. The announcer said that if you encounter someone going the wrong way, you were welcome to "de-pants" them. Hum.....I'm not sure I would have had the energy to do that.


Because I estimated my swim time to be "forever and a year", I got a high race number. This meant that I was towards the end of the line to start the swim. It was almost an hour before I was in the pool. I was very happy that the water had warmed up because this pool is usually incredibly cold but I did get tired of waiting.

The most challenging part of the swim besides huffing and puffing and not being able to blow anything down, was all the other swimmers in the pool. It seemed likes someone was always trying to pass or I was needing to pass someone. I was doing all I could to make it from one end to the other. The shallowest water was 6'2" so it's not like I could stop and walk. I'll admit I took breaks at the end of the lanes.


Finally, it was done.


Biking:
I jogged to the transition area, barefooted and wet, patted my hair a few times and sucked up some extra water from my swim wear. I put on my biking shirt, socks and shoes, sunglasses, helmet, grabbed my bike, and started the cycling segment. I was still dripping!
The bike route was up and down some long hills but I swear there was more up than down. Going up the last hill, I saw a poodle walking a lady and I really wanted to draft off that poodle.


As I was finishing the bike course, I saw several runners at the turnaround point. They were moving incredibly slow and some were walking.
I'm thinking to myself, "Hum....why are they moving so slow? I won't have that problem...". Then I finished the biking event.

BAWAHAHAHAHAHA!
I had to eat humble pie! By the time I got off my bike, my legs were barely moving and it was surprisingly hard to breathe! I have actually practiced this transition and noticed the noodle legs but my practice ride was not as long or hilly. I was very happy to get off that bike!

Back in the transition area, I took off my helmet and put on my pirate costume, including the wig, and started running. I had already pinned my racing number to my costume. The run: I provided entertainment for the other runners and volunteers. They seem to enjoy the red-headed pirate that looked like she was running through cheesecake. The run was uneventful otherwise.

I finished and really, really wanted to puke. No really. But I didn't. Then I realized that somehow I had missed the pancakes.
Holy Pathetic Pancake for a Pirate! What's up with that?


Yea! My medal:


Mr. Pumpkin wears my medal.
It says Monster Triathlon Finisher. No really.


Ms. Pumpkin has been pumping some iron.
Look at those shoulders!

When I returned home, I found that our house had been given a "Halloween Chain Letter". The instructions indicate to post the sign that indicates that you have been given the treats and to secretly provide treats for two other neighbors. Hum.....I think I will accidentally forget to post my sign and hope that other neighbors give me more treats.

Um...ReformingGeek?

Yes?

That sounds like something I would do. Good for you. You're learning.

Photos: Race photos NOT taken by still sleeping ReformingGeek Hubby. Medal photos staged and photographed by ReformingGeek pretending to be a fashion designer.

25 comments:

Deb said...

Woo Hoo (which is the English translation of Arrrrgh)!

Congratulations, Noodle Legs! So will we see you in the Olympics?

The World As I See It said...

Congrats on finishing. I could never do that and if I could I don't think that I would want to do it.

BlackLOG said...

First Off congratulations on surviving.. just a few points:-

I'm not so sure I would have been as happy as you that the swimming pool warmed up so quickly. Sounds like a lot of competitive wee had gone before you. Those triathletes can get a bit over excited at times.

Jelly legs - I was given an excellent tip for avoiding those after the bike ride element. Don't have a high gear all the way through the ride -for the last 400 meters or so drop into a very low gear with little resistance. Then as your fellow competitors flop around like goldfish on a patio, you can streak passed them to victory and world domination….[insert mad manic laughter at this point].

The other ideas is a bit more controversial and involves getting someone else to do the running for you…This may not be treated as strictly within the rules….

ReformingGeek said...

@Deb - Thanks! ARRRGGH, was about right. Yeah. Olympics - in my next life. ;-)

@World - Thanks!

@BlackLog - Thanks. Yeah. I was at the back of the line. I definitely want to get better at swimming. As for the biking, I forgot about that trick. Thanks.

otin said...

It really is an accomplishment! To me, a triathlon is a shit, shower and shave! LMFAO!!!!

mama-face said...

bwahahahahahaha...I hate those neighborhood treat things sooooooooo much. I take the treats and I end the chain. I hate being blackmailed into making cookies. Which reminds me, I need to find that dang ghost and hang it in my window. Otherwise I'm gonna end up with more treats. shoot.

hahaha...I totally ripped into that without congratulating you on your triathlon. I've WATCHED a triathlon once (my son) and I was plumb wore out. I am so proud of you; honestly. I loved your retelling. I knew it would be entertaining. You are truly gifted.

YAY YAY YAY YAY!!

ps I'm waiting for my chocolate cake. You promised ...

ReformingGeek said...

@otin - Thanks and I can always count on laughing at your comments!

@mama-face - Yeah. I'm breaking the chain. hehe. I feel so evil.

Yeah, right.

Thanks for the congrats and the kind words. As for the cake.....er......I may have to send you cookies and take a photo of the cake.

K a b l o o e y said...

Great job, especially in that wig, which must have itched some. And no mention of worrisome nudity at the transition areas, so you are a more secure woman than I. Lame jokes aside, that's an amazing accomplishment and I'm proud I pseudo know you. The only way I'm going to finish one is if they let me do the water segment with a kickboard and fins. Or put a recumbent exercise bike in the pool and let me count that distance.

Quirkyloon said...

Wow!

Congrats Reffie!

I'm in awe. My BBFF is a triathlete-ess! Awesome! Good work GF!

And zombies love noodle legs! Ha!

ReformingGeek said...

@Kablooey - Thanks. There was a girl that did a frog stroke on her back the whole time. I actually passed her!

@Quirky - Thanks. After that bike ride, the zombies could have taken me easily!

I Wonder Wye said...

Congratulations!! What an accomplishment!! That is an awesome achievement. So glad you got a cool medal, too. Thanks for stopping by to read some ghost stories....had one earlier about a ghost in the attic that scared Excy out of his studio....that house had all kinds of crazy!

Jean Knee said...

you were boo'd. don't get me started on that and you freakin better put the sign out or I'll come up there

Jean Knee said...

oh, congrats on being a finisher

Yesterday I was in bed with a head ache and barely moved at all

ReformingGeek said...

@Wonder Wye - Thanks. That sounds like one crazy house!

@Jean - Thanks. Coming up to bring me treats? Cool. Sorry about the headache.

CatLadyLarew said...

Way to go, Reffie! And I love your award! You deserve all the candy in your neighborhood... and you know you'll need it to restore your vigor after that race!

Nooter said...

oh i like swimming and running at the park, but my feet cant reach the controls on a bike so i would hafta ride in a sidecar.

ReformingGeek said...

@CatLady - Thanks! Candy sounds pretty good right now.

@Nooter - I'll be happy to put you in a sidecar.....connected to my bike.

Jacki said...

Wow....congratulations on finishing the triathalon! You are more woman that I am!

The Old Silly said...

Wow. They should bring back the Wonder Woman TV show featuring our very own Reforming Geek! Proud of ya!

Marvin D Wilson

ReformingGeek said...

@Jacki - Thanks!

@Marvin - Thanks! Hum....can I have her boobs?

Hit 40 said...

Having all the swimmers in the pool makes waves that does make it harder to swim. The best place to be is in the center of the pool where the least waves are.

Congratulations on finishing the triathlon!! Very awesome.

Skye said...

Congrats on making it through! Somehow I doubt that I'd be able to do it. Who am I kidding!?! I can't even stand to ride my bike for more than 2 blocks on level ground, never mind the hills and race part!

Like I said, Congrats, you done good!

PS
Ms Pumpkin looks in pretty good shape :D

ReformingGeek said...

@Hit40 - Thanks! Yes, I noticed the waves but we had to swim all the lanes like a snake.

@Skye - Thanks. You would be surprised at what you can do!

The Constant Complainer said...

Very impressive. I loved reading about it. And I was glad you gave such detailed descriptions too, because until you did, I was trying to figure out how it would work in an indoor pool, for example.

Congrats!

Collette said...

Well, shiver me timbers! LOL. Congrats for even doing it. I wouldn't have even made it in the pool. If the water is above neck level for me, forget it! I can't swim to save my life. I can float a little due to my buoys (Uh, girls), but I have to touch bottom or I freak!


"1.00s, 1.50s, 1.75s for the short arms. If you know what I'm talking about, you're probably old, too."

"Boomer brain fog: What was the last, middle, and first part of what you just said to me?"