Pebbles in Lingerie With a Bee in Her Bonnet

Wait.  Pebbles doesn't have a bonnet.  She has a bone.  I'll get to that in a moment.

I'm watching a scene on a TV show where the sexy blond walks out of the bathroom in silky lingerie and high heels.  I asked Hubby if this is what he thinks I should be wearing when I come out of the bathroom at night instead of the old T-shirt, shorts, face mask, Bengay cream, and curlers?

Oh.  That explains a few things.

I might be able to get the lingerie on, padding the top quite a bit, but the heels?  Um, no.  Evil Twin would trip me.  Hubby would be trying to explain to the nice man with the badge and gun that I accidentally impaled myself with our framed wedding photo that was knocked off the wall when I fell.

Oops.

Let's move on.

I'm doing a triathlon tomorrow.  It has a caveman theme.  I made a costume out of what's left of my Pebbles costume:

Yes, that's really my hair with a "bone" in it.

With the warm spring we're having down here, I'm a bit worried about how hot I'm going to be in that thing!

Event photos may or may not come later.  I'll have to stick the bone in my visor or hat because there is no way I'll be able to get it to stay in my wet hair after swimming and cycling!

Maybe I should borrow BamBam's club.  Knocking my competitors out of the way may be the only way I won't finish last!

Kidding.  Kidding.  I'm not *Tonya Harding.

I've got some nice blooms in the garden this spring.  Evil Twin provides captions:

Wow!  Check out that splatter pattern.

You're not hiding from ME, are you, Pinky?  

I won't cut on you.  Promise.

I'm trying to catch a bee to put in Reffie's 

bonnet...er...hat for her race tomorrow. 

Have a great week!

*Just in case you don't remember or you are too young, Tonya had fellow ice-skater Nancy Kerrigan clubbed in the knee prior to the US Championships in 1994.

Photo credits:  Pebbles and BamBam

Beaded Yellow Bird Reports This Week's Business

Hi there, folks!  E. Vile Tweety here, blogging in for Reffie and Evil Twin.  "E" as in heck-if-I-know but Reffie told me the Vile is because I'm a messy birdie, squeezing thru the bars of my cage and pooping all over the place.

Reffie, Evil Twin, and Hubby are going away for awhile.  Reffie said something about white coats so it must be cold and dark where they are going.

I SAID COAST, YOU SILLY BIRD!

Sheesh.  What is with her today?

Anybirdie, here's my mug shot: 

 Aren't I a Purdy Birdie?

I taut I taw a Puddy Tat.  Whoa.  I did.  I did.

I can't imagine what that tart did for those beads.

And what's with dis dude?  

Show-off!

"Puddy Tat, stop swatting at those feathers!"

That silly thing.  I also caught her going after Reffie's Finisher Medal from Sunday's Cowtown Half Marathon.  Bad Kitty!  Reffie worked hard to finish that race.  She said it felt like summer with warm temps, high humidity and a brisk southern breeze in her face as she had to climb a Texas mountain at mile 9.    Even so, she eked out a personal best and has been stuck on herself for the last few days.  Two years ago it was 27 degrees with a brisk northern breeze and she complained about that, too.  There is NO pleasing that girl.

Evil Twin is very excited about Mardi Gras.  She has been reviewing some wicked margarita recipes and is ready for the party.  She insisted we all wear those shiny chains around our necks.   Sheesh.  That's just something else to drive that despicable black furry beast nuts.    She also said she hopes that you get the bird when you eat the King Cake.  Hearing this is deeply disturbing.

THE BABY, YOU STUPID YELLOW FEATHERY APPETIZER!

Baby?  Oh, my.  That is truy evil.  

Oh, I get it now.  E.Vile is evil.

Hey....

Ms. Spring, You Owe Us an Apology!

While folks up north and to the east enjoyed our warm Texas weather this past weekend, spring came to north Texas with an attitude, or a hangover, or both.  It must have been some party Ms. Spring attended.  

We had rain, and some more rain, and then snow, and some more snow.   Also, saying that we had a bit of a breeze would be an understatement.  The squirrels adapted by sprouting wings.  They gracefully flew through the trees when they were brave enough to come out of hiding.  Rabbits were getting a little extra air on their hops, easily avoiding Cat while he slept on a warm binkie snuggled up next to me in the warm house.  

Hum...maybe my twisted view of local "wildlife" was caused by a different kind of hops.

Although the snow blew away by mid-afternoon on Sunday,  there was enough of it in some areas to cause some serious issues with our roads. Texans with spring fever hit by a freak snowstorm in the dark is not a good mix.  It would be similar to rednecks in tuxedos singing opera.

Yeah.  I know. That's enough whining.  It's Texas.  The weather changes quickly.

TODAY IS BEAUTIFUL!  I'm having a bit of an issue with lead foot.  I have to drive through numerous 30-mile zones to get to my part-time job and I try to keep it under 40.  I'm having a hard time today.

Maybe I was in a hurry to get home and write this post.  

I know I was in a hurry to get out of the cold water at the gym.  Maybe Ms. Spring left some of her blasted frigid white stuff in the pool?

Sheesh!  I did a lot of full-stroke swimming this morning eliminating some of the drills that I normally do because they don't keep my heart rate up high enough to stay warm. 

Yeah.  I know.  I'm whining again.  LOL.

Have a happy Monday!

I have some photos from my St. Patrick's Day Triathlon.  Enjoy!

 Slithering up the ladder

 Loving the sunshine

 Where's the finish line?

 Satisfied finisher!

Photos:  Your Sporting Image by Karen Thibodeaux, purchased by Reforming Geek

Big Fish, Little Fish, and Bottom Feeders

You probably noticed that someone stole an hour from most of us over the weekend.  Yes, you lucky folks in Arizona and Hawaii still have your hour.  Wait.  Maybe you've been stealing them all along. 

THIEVES!

Off to the races...

After losing that hour and not being able to sleep all that well anyway, I somehow got out of bed Sunday morning for the St. Patrick's Day Triathlon.

The weather was nice.  There was no wind in the chilly transition area at 6:30 am when I arrived and arranged my stuff but I was glad when they let us inside the natatorium to hang around for the start of the race. 

Swimmers hit the water by 7:40 am and I listened to a dude playing bagpipes for over an hour before it was my turn to swim.  Can I have his lung capacity?

In the pool, I felt pretty good until the next to last leg.  That's when I encountered octopi.  No, these weren't critters recently escaped from the ocean, but they were men flailing about doing every stroke imaginable to stay afloat and to get ahead of the other guys (of course!).  There were hands and legs and bodies everywhere going nowhere. They completely blocked the swim lane so I had to invent a slither stroke to get around them.  SHEESH!

The exit ladder was a welcome sight.

  

After dripping my way through the transition area to my stuff and attempting to towel off,  I hopped on my bike for the next part of the race.

While on my ride, I saw a local elite runner out for her morning practice.  This woman chases cars for practice.  No, not really, but she does sprint half marathons. She reminds me of the Energizer Bunny and the vortex of energy around her is surely very powerful.  Her name is Fiona (what a pretty name) which I've conveniently changed to "Speedy Fi (fee)".  Maybe it's good her parents did not name her Phoebe.  "Speedy Phoebe" is just too hard to say.

I must learn to siphon her energy.  Too bad she was going the opposite direction or I might have asked her to carry me and my bike up the hill.

Finally, I finished the ride, found my stuff, racked my bike, took off my bike helmet (very important) and started the run.

But wait. What's this?  My feet were numb.  What the frozen tundra was that about?  Yes, it was chilly on the bike after being in the water but I didn't think I was that cold.  Apparently, I was.  That, and the fact that my brain said "send blood to quads, glutes, and hamstrings" over and over again for almost an hour.

The finish line was beautiful.  Hubby arrived just as the announcer called my name as I was crossing the line.  Hubby couldn't have planned that if he'd tried.   

I got me some pancakes, and no, they weren't green.

The lady with the green hair...

I wore my costume.  I had the shirt and skirt on for the bike ride and added the green hair and a hat for the run.  I received many comments, mostly from guys on bikes passing me saying "nice skirt".......

I certainly didn't mind.  A few of the ladies indicated that they liked my hair.    There weren't too many costumes so it must have been up to me to entertain folks!

The results are in....

Surprisingly, on the running part, I did quite well, coming in second in my age group.  For swimming, I need to advance from bottom feeder to at least little fishie drafting off big fishies in order to improve my swim time.  I improved my biking time by over 10 minutes.  I noticed something else, though.  My quads are about 1/3 the size of some of these ladies' quads.  That can be said for my butt, too, and that's a good thing!

Update: Although I'm happy with my run results, I placed very low in the swim and bike events so my overall result makes me somewhere between a bottom feeder and a little fish.  LOL.

I hope to have some photos soon.

Spring Arrives, Sinks Sedan, While Geek in Strange Clothing Rants On

It's rained so much out here that our yards are soggy.  One of my neighbors got a little over-excited about spring and decided to mow using his riding mower.  Surprise.  Surprise.  It got stuck in his front yard. 

Then he must have swallowed an insanity pill because he tried to rescue the lawn mower with his CAR.  That's right.  CAR.  No, not his truck, but a 2-door sedan, an older vehicle he's had sitting around for awhile.  Um....gee, guess what happened?

Yes, indeedy.  It's stuck, too.

One of my azaleas has bloomed.  It must be confused.   The daffodils aren't even finished yet!

Yes, those are leaves in the background.  Anytime you guys want to show up with brooms and rakes is fine with me!

Ok. Ok.  On with the rant:

Did you know that Natatoriums have Nazis?  I think these are the same type of people that must work at schools herding rowdy little kiddies in and out of the building, monitoring the lunch room, jumping out from behind potted plants scaring children, etc.   

When I went to the local Natatorium to pick up my race packet for Sunday's triathlon, I encountered such a person.  She will be known as NN, the Natatorium Nazi.

Yeah, N-squared.  I caught that.

The packet pick-up area was in a crowded part of the lobby.  Yes, that was the first problem.  There wasn't much space to wait your turn so there was little bit of a line.  We were standing in line chatting about the race but apparently we weren't doing it right.  NN got all huffy and fussy because we weren't keeping the line moving.  She said that people were having to stand outside.  HEAVENS TO BETSY!  WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?  It's 65 degrees and dry.  We won't freeze or melt or did I miss recent reports of zombie activity in the area?

These are ADULTS that are competing in a triathlon.  I think we can handle it, NN. 

Maybe she thought we were sheep?

Beware of wolves, NN.

NN was also instructing us as to where we could or could not fill out forms.   Yes, another problem.  We were told to go across the room to use the tables to fill out the forms.  Of course nobody was doing this.  We were using whatever we could find as a hard surface and NN made her displeasure known!  Um.......how about providing a table close to the pick-up area?   

Sheesh.

I was trying to picture myself calm and at peace but thoughts of NN falling into the pool, falling under the wheels of a bus, being strangled with a race T-shirt, writing "I will not be rude" on the board 1000 times, tripping over a potted plant,  etc., kept coming into my mind.  

For shame.

Finally, Sunday's race is another costume race in honor of St. Patrick's Day.  Here is my expression of a Scottish lass bringing snakes to Ireland:

Again. For shame.

All of you Irish out there, please stop throwing things at me. 

Photos:  ReformingGeek

Tri Baby, Tri!

My very first triathlon is complete. Status: PASS

I'm already planning improvements for next year. Grab some caffeine and let me tell you all about it:

We gathered in the transition area at O'Dark-Thirty before Dawn had even thought about showing her butt crack. This is where were marked for target practice......er....I mean labeled with permanent markers. Yes. I still have the remnants of my race number on both arms and my age on my leg. No, I didn't get any pictures of my arms and legs.

That's my blue bike and the pirate wig is
at the bottom of the pile.

After setting up my bike and organizing my stuff for the race, standing in line to get my timing chip, and a quick pit stop, it was time to start the race.

The first event was swimming which is by far my weakest event. We had to swim 300 meters in an indoor pool. The lanes were 50 meters long and the course was like a snake. That is, you swim down the lane, cross under the rope and swim up the next lane, etc., until you either drown or finish the course.

OK. OK. There were some cutie lifeguards that looked about 10. They probably wouldn't have let me drown.

The "snake" course allows all swimmers to be going the same direction. The announcer said that if you encounter someone going the wrong way, you were welcome to "de-pants" them. Hum.....I'm not sure I would have had the energy to do that.

Because I estimated my swim time to be "forever and a year", I got a high race number. This meant that I was towards the end of the line to start the swim. It was almost an hour before I was in the pool. I was very happy that the water had warmed up because this pool is usually incredibly cold but I did get tired of waiting.

The most challenging part of the swim besides huffing and puffing and not being able to blow anything down, was all the other swimmers in the pool. It seemed likes someone was always trying to pass or I was needing to pass someone. I was doing all I could to make it from one end to the other. The shallowest water was 6'2" so it's not like I could stop and walk. I'll admit I took breaks at the end of the lanes.

Finally, it was done.

Biking: I jogged to the transition area, barefooted and wet, patted my hair a few times and sucked up some extra water from my swim wear. I put on my biking shirt, socks and shoes, sunglasses, helmet, grabbed my bike, and started the cycling segment. I was still dripping!
The bike route was up and down some long hills but I swear there was more up than down. Going up the last hill, I saw a poodle walking a lady and I really wanted to draft off that poodle.

As I was finishing the bike course, I saw several runners at the turnaround point. They were moving incredibly slow and some were walking. I'm thinking to myself, "Hum....why are they moving so slow? I won't have that problem...". Then I finished the biking event.

BAWAHAHAHAHAHA! I had to eat humble pie! By the time I got off my bike, my legs were barely moving and it was surprisingly hard to breathe! I have actually practiced this transition and noticed the noodle legs but my practice ride was not as long or hilly. I was very happy to get off that bike!

Back in the transition area, I took off my helmet and put on my pirate costume, including the wig, and started running. I had already pinned my racing number to my costume. The run: I provided entertainment for the other runners and volunteers. They seem to enjoy the red-headed pirate that looked like she was running through cheesecake. The run was uneventful otherwise.

I finished and really, really wanted to puke. No really. But I didn't. Then I realized that somehow I had missed the pancakes. Holy Pathetic Pancake for a Pirate! What's up with that?

Yea! My medal:

Mr. Pumpkin wears my medal.
It says Monster Triathlon Finisher. No really.

Ms. Pumpkin has been pumping some iron.
Look at those shoulders!

When I returned home, I found that our house had been given a "Halloween Chain Letter". The instructions indicate to post the sign that indicates that you have been given the treats and to secretly provide treats for two other neighbors. Hum.....I think I will accidentally forget to post my sign and hope that other neighbors give me more treats.

Um...ReformingGeek?

Yes?

That sounds like something I would do. Good for you. You're learning.

Photos: Race photos NOT taken by still sleeping ReformingGeek Hubby. Medal photos staged and photographed by ReformingGeek pretending to be a fashion designer.