Thursday, December 12, 2013

Space Cadet Sails Away, Gets Wet, and Lands in Iceville

It's been quite a month around here.  Cat has puffed out to his true snowball self and is demanding the walking warm spots plant themselves on a couch to provide laps.

Hubby and I hopped on a plane and flew to Florida so I could compete in the Space Coast Half Marathon in Cocoa Village.  It was a fun race and I set a personal record for a half marathon.  Oh, how I love flatter courses.  Hee Hee.

There was some cool race bling....



....and none of these critters on the course, thankfully!




Then Hubby and I sailed away on this big ship:


We had a lovely time even when it rained cats, dogs, ferrets, fish, and weird statues on us in San Juan:




Our cabin was warm and dry. We had some fun with the towel art:



While we were away, our hometown in north Texas turned into an Ice Bowl (it was too depressing to photograph), forcing our big airport down to one runway and to show boards full of canceled flights.  Our flight home from Florida was canceled but we got on the next flight.  Our wonderful and brave friends collected us from the airport and drove us to our home in some very nasty conditions.  

 Oh, and somebody told me Christmas is coming so I got out my decorations.  I had a few problems:



Yes, I'm sure Evil Twin had something to do with these broken decorations. 

She's getting a lump of coal in her stocking.

Happy Holidays!

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Hit the Snooze Button

No.  Please stop this madness.  It's not Christmas season.  It can't be Christmas season.  It was just October the other day, right?

Sigh.  I know some of you have already put up your Christmas lights.  A curse on you!  Kidding.  I get it.  You're going to be out of town, the kids are coming over, the weather's been nice.  I get it.  I just don't like it.

Whine. Whine.  Yesterday, a "last-minute" Hammacher Schlemmer catalog arrived in the mail.  Last-minute?  Really?  At least it's good entertainment and my wish list is nearly complete.

To kick-off the start-to-get-ready-to-think-about-gifts season, I've selected a few of my favorites:

I love taking power naps.  But, really, this thing?


I can see why Evil Twin loves it.  It is so her.   I'm a bit concerned about wearing it on an airplane, though, but at least it would hide the drool.  That hairstyle you put together?  It's toast.


Let's take it to the next level:



Wouldn't you love one of these in your office?  Let me get my warm cat and binkie.


But this last one is the one you simply must have....



in your spaceship.  I will certainly have one in mine.

Practice safe snoozing out there, folks.

Photos courtesy of Hammacher Schlemmer.

Monday, November 4, 2013

I want a PEACE of you!

I'm excited to see my blogging friends writing about PEACE today.  Peace begins within and we need more of it in this world.  We also need humor.  Peace is getting a lot of attention.  Unfortunately, "piece" got upset about this and decided to assert herself, via Evil Twin, of course.

I want a piece of you!

Whoa.  That's not peaceful.  Back off.

I want a piece of pie.

Ok.  That's better.  I'll make one.....soon.

Wow.  That's a nice piece!

Um, what EXACTLY are you talking about?

That shotgun hanging on the wall.  What did you THINK I was talking about?

Sigh.  I'm glad you clarified that but I think that term is used for handguns.


Ok.  That's enough.  I hope you are having a peaceful day.

Singing (more likely disturbing the peace)....

Let there be peace on earth
And let it begin with me.
Let there be peace on earth
The peace that was meant to be.
With God as our father
Brothers all are we.
Let me walk with my brother
In perfect harmony.

 
Let peace begin with me
Let this be the moment now.
With every step I take
Let this be my solemn vow.
To take each moment
And live each moment
With peace eternally.
Let there be peace on earth,
And let it begin with me.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Pumpkin poop

It's almost Halloween.  Are you ready for the Great Pumpkin?

What are you on about?

The giant pumpkin that comes from space, lands on earth and poops enough puree for everyone to have pumpkin pie and spits enough seeds for a decent trail mix. 

Um.....I think you are confused. There is no Great Pumpkin, spaceship, or poopship for that matter.  Besides, big pumpkins don't make good pie, muffins, scones, or doughnuts. 

You're not very imaginative and you sound like you're hungry.  Wait.  Did you say doughnuts?

Yep.  Sorry My left-brain goes on overload sometimes.  Would you please straighten those pictures on that wall over there and then let me finish this Sudoku?

Um, no. But you have to admit that this guy is up to something:

I am the Great Pumpkin.  I shall drown you with my puree.

Hee Hee.  Good one, Evil Twin.  With that smile, it looks like the cat that swallowed the canary.  It's only got one eye but I guess that didn't matter.  Um....where IS the cat?

Find other humor bloggers posting about Halloween over here.


Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Caught in the Act

Purple Cat looks guilty.  I'm not sure if he's humping Lady Scare, protecting his catch, or trying to cook his catch in this make-shift stew pot. 

Wait!  What's got my tail?


Fortunately, this lady escaped to the woods but then her luck changed.  She was snared by Bat Web.  Bat Web was set by the spiders to lure unsuspecting straw figures.  Got dinner?

Help me! 

It's a Halloween Carnival.  Find other spooks over at humorbloggers.com!



Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Keep Calm and Spook On!

Evil Twin, Cat, and I decorated our front porch for Halloween!  Yea!

There are enough creepy-crawlies here to meet every need:

EEEEEK!  I see a ghost in that window.  HeeHeeHeeHaHaHa!

Cat loves his purple self doing what he does best, trying to get FUD.  Evil Twin found the skeleton in her closet (SNORT!) and decided to give it some fresh air.  I'm pretty sure she has a few fingers and toes in that little jar she's holding.  Ms. Evil also swept her closet and the cobwebs she gathered are perfect here on my porch.  What did I contribute?  Well, um, the pumpkins.  I love carved pumpkins, or any pumpkin, especially when baked in a sweet, moist pumpkin treat.   For here, plastic will have to do.  Oh, and there are little LED tea lights inside the pumpkins to make them flicker and glow at night.  Now I just need some sound effects!

It's just one scary day after the next around here.

Monday, September 30, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - HAPPILY EVER AFTER!

There once was a geek named Reffie.  She lived with her Hubby, her Cat named Oreo Kitty, and her Evil Twin, named Evil Twin.  Reffie lost her sanity and participated in this 30 days of photographs event hosted by the sizzling, cheese-hating Ziva and the mischievous, funnel-cake-loving MIKEWJ.  

On Day 1, Reffie screamed for ice cream.  On Day 2....

What?

They don't want a day-by-day review.

Oh, ok.  Finally, on Day 30, Reffie photographed her backside, posted Day 30, and exited stage left, happily ever after.    I bet the others are just as happy!

THE REAR END!


Sunday, September 29, 2013

30 Days of Photogrpahs IV - Circle

I had several ideas for the circle prompt but as I stopped to look at my figurine collection a few days ago, ignoring the dust (Achoo!), I noticed a little cutie playing with a crystal ball.  I couldn't resist. 

I'll admit photographing a shiny gold thing with a crystal proved to be beyond my novice photography skills.  I'm reasonably happy with this first photo as you can actually tell that it's a cat.
The second photo may have a bit more color in the crystal but also offers another circle, the backside of my wedding ring.  My ring was another idea for today.

Shiny kitty with round shiny thing!

This is a handy play area!

What a sweet kitty this is, so quiet, and never gets under foot.

Now go see what's spinning over at Ziva's merry-go-round today.


Saturday, September 28, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Lover

These little guys have been with us since Hubby and I were married.  Our parents put them into position for us while we were away on our honeymoon.

They wuv each other beary, beary much.

That's right.  Our PARENTS did this.  Sigh.  And, no, we did not leave them this way.  We told them to get a room and they jumped into a basket.  Wait.  Maybe they can stay.  They don't have claws and don't wake us up during the wee hours.

See the others and their lovers over at the sizzling Inferno.

Friday, September 27, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - NSEW

I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.  It might be a freight train but as long as it takes me to one of my favorite places, it will be ok.

Jellystone (Yellowstone National Park!!)  Notice the photo book I made!

When we go to national parks, we try to get one or more of this type of map.  I like all the pretty colors.  Hee Hee.  Kidding.  The maps are colorful but they help get us oriented to the area.  They show elevation so I'll know if I need my parka for the turnaround point on our hike or if I need to take oxygen with me.   They can also tolerate getting wet which seems to happen once or twice when we go hiking.

Evil Twin just asked if it shows Yogi and Smokey.

Sheesh.

The other maps in the photo are from Glacier National Park and a couple from Colorado National Forest areas.

Be sure and get lost over at Ziva's today.  Oh, and make sure you stop in at MikeWJ's place and have him take you to Mt. Evans.  Mind the bear activity nearby.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Rising

I want to make State Fair Hot Rolls.  What do I do?

Evil Twin, you're the best!  I love those.  I could eat the entire pan in one sitting!  You'll need a rising agent.  Start with a package of yeast and some sugar and add warm water.



WAIT!  Don't pour the water just yet.   OPEN the package.....  Good, now we're getting closer.

While my bread rises,  go check out the early, and not so early risers over at the Inferno

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Poison

Sigh.  I'm tired of lecturing you, Evil Twin.  This is not the first time your poison pen has got us in trouble!  Now, sit down and do your punishment and be glad I'm not Professor Umbridge:



Ah, geez.  That's hideous.  You're going to have to start again.  I'm going to need some of my own poison to deal with you today:



Kahlua over ice cream anyone?

Hiccup.  Somebody may have a poison apple over at Ziva's today.  Whatever you do, don't give it to our other host, MikeWJ.  That wouldn't be very nice.


Tuesday, September 24, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Carnival

"Will there be rides?  What about snow cones and corn dogs?"

Sorry, not today, Evil Twin.  I'm showing them my ships, my Carnival ships.  I have been fortunate enough to have gone on several Carnival cruises.  Fortunately, none of them were on ships that stranded folks in the middle of the ocean!

Bonus!  Reffie shows some arm. Click to see her bicep in all its glory!
Back in the day, Carnival used to give you a print of your ship as a souvenir.  My mom and I went on our first cruise in 1984 and the black-framed print on the right is the Mardi Gras, a classic old ship that was retired ages ago.  It had some gorgeous woodwork.  Hubby and I took our first cruise on the Celebration (black frame on the left).  I won the 4-day cruise in a drawing at my former employer!   The other ship is the Conquest, a ship we sailed on in 2002 back when it was still new.  It was so pretty and shiny.  Cat would have loved it.  And Tweety?  Well, who doesn't love Tweety?  He's a cruisin', too.  Oh, and Cat would definitely love him.  Burp.

Join the Carnival fun today over at Festival of Ziva!  Take her some cotton candy but leave your cheese at home.

Monday, September 23, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Tolstoy


"In the name of God, stop a moment, 
cease your work, look around you."  
Leo Tolstoy

 Boxed Cat surveys his domain and waits impatiently for his evening meal.

Evil Twin and Cat have re-written this quote:

"In the name of Cat,  stop what you're doing and feed me."  


Go see what the others have done with Mr. Tolstoy today.

Sunday, September 22, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Frustration

Cat has presented me with his source of frustration:

I see a kitty.  Hee Hee.  It can't get me.  Hee Hee.

Crooked-Tail has been hanging around for awhile.  A couple of months ago, his tail was much shorter.  It is growing back with a kink.  Cat is frustrated because he can't get him, no matter how many times he jumps on the window, trying to latch onto the the glass and then sliding down.  Cat also doesn't understand why I won't get that lizard for him.  After all, I am the chief fooder around here!

My frustration?  Well, it's my not-so-kind friend, Arthur Itis, that beastard.  These concoctions help ease the pain in my knee allowing me to continue to run like a bear was chasing me.  Actually, I think the bear would probably get me:

Take that, Arthur!

For more frustrated people and their cheerful photos, go here.  Oh, and I have failed to give enough encouragement of gifts for MikeWJ.  How frustrating for him.  I think he may need some aspirin by now.

Saturday, September 21, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Anatomy

Evil Twin sings "The head bone is connected to the foot bone.  The foot bone is connected to the tailbone..."  Hiccup.

Oh dear.  I wonder what species she is talking about or maybe I need to take that bottle of wine away from her.

Let's look at human anatomy.  How about this?

Nice middle-aged thumb! Need manicure much?

Yes, it's my thumb or as I like to say, it's my fifth finger.  It's straight instead of curved at the end.  Perhaps I am not human.

Now that I've thrown you a bone, go see some anatomically correct photos over at the hot place.  Be sure to shower Ziva with gifts and thank her and MikeWJ profusely for hosting this insane photo event.

Sarcasm much?

Friday, September 20, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Transparent

For transparent, I present you with a painting by the late D. L. Valdes.  He lived in New Mexico.  We love Santa Fe and visit when we can.  A favorite activity was visiting his shop just to see what cool paintings and prints he had done since the last time.  We have several of his prints, all reflective of the high desert and/or animals of the area.  It was a sad, sad, visit when we learned he had passed away.

How many wolves do you see?  Oh, and doesn't it look great over our fireplace?

I bet they don't have transparent wolves in Finland but you might want to check.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Never

Never say something never happens to you, or you never this or that.  Ha!  It's a trick.  It allows Fate to say "Watch me! PFFFFT!"

For today's topic,  I chose the never-ending, circular pie:

Blueberry - fresh out of the oven!

Oh, wrong pie?

Oops.

How about this one?

The real, never-ending pi courtesy of some rotting firewood! 


Take that, Fate.

I'm sure you're exclaiming, "Well, I never!"  No?  Well then, you'd better go straight to the Inferno.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Always

"There's always tomorrow......

Reffie spots a a beautiful Texas September sunrise at the local recreation center.

and if there isn't, it won't matter." - Reffie

You can ALWAYS go see Ziva for more.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - My Junk

Oh my. I'm not sure I recommend googling "my junk".  The results could be rather interesting.  Fortunately, my junk is not x-rated.  It was just recently re-organized, though.

Baseball caps, Diving, Paint, Golf, Fitness, all in one corner

Hm....most of this is Hubby's junk but that newly mounted cabinet has my fitness DVDs which I view on that TV, and if you look in the mirror, you can see the piano and some of my running medals and photos.  Oh, and an empty growler.  Did anyone have to google that?

See more junk here.

Monday, September 16, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Biblical

Yes, Evil Twin, I do have a Bible.   I will even show you my very first Bible.  My parents gave it to me when I was four.

Illustrated!

Yes, I know there is purple crayon on page 10.  Sigh.  I'm sure my brother did that.

Yes, I see that the illustration is supposed to be Adam and Eve, and yes, I do think they are a bit over-dressed.  No, I don't see the snake.

Click here for photos of Jesus on toast, Jesus in the coffee, and other creative interpretations of the Biblical prompt.  Or visit Father MikeWJ for an explanation of what this 30 days stuff is all about. 


Sunday, September 15, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - China

Forever ago when I worked in the IT industry,  one of the programmers in my group was from China.  She was a sweetheart and gave me this scroll as a gift when she left the company.  It's a Chinese love poem:

Wait.  Where's the panda?

Evil Twin is smirking and suggested that it isn't a love poem but actually says "May you drown in your own piss, you bee-otch!"

Oh dear.  Sniff.  I thought she liked me.

Evil Twin apologized and then suggested that this "Asian" scroll was probably made in Mexico.

Sigh.

Visit Ziva for more China.  Maybe you will see a panda or two.

Saturday, September 14, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - NSFW

Oh my.  I hope the kiddies, kitties, and puppies aren't nearby.  What a naughty, naughty, cat to flaunt himself like this:



Evil Twin can't stop giggling.  Cat has no idea he's such entertainment for us (and wouldn't care if he did).  For more, um, entertainment, go to Finland.

Friday, September 13, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Wrong

If you're seeing this later in the day or missing my comments on your rightly wrong photo, it's because I'm being poked, prodded, and up-periscoped at the outpatient surgery center.


Yes, the little pills are smiling.  That's very WRONG and most naughty!

If you don't know what procedure requires a prep with the items in this photo, you are too young.  Move along.  This isn't the blog you are looking for.

Kidding.  Evil Twin couldn't resist.

Everybody is wrong over here, right?

Thursday, September 12, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Tremor

Evil Twin begins to sing the chorus....

Shake, shake, shake.
Shake, shake, shake.
Shake your camera.
Shake your camera. 



Pfffft.  It's shake your booty and it was an earthquake, Silly.  There's been a lot of fracking in the area. Or maybe I was shaken up by the storm that made that mess in my driveway.

I'm going to go find my disco outfit now.  Shake things up a bit and visit Ziva for more of this madness.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Girly

Evil Twin and I almost came to blows over this topic.  She wanted to paint the cat's talons, er, claws with some trendy polish and I wouldn't let her.  Cat wouldn't let her, either.

I wanted to see shoes.  I don't have very many "girly" shoes but I think these may qualify:

Reffie walks down the runway with her shiny girly shoes.

The runway lights are bright.  Reffie need sunglasses!

These shoes were made for.....date nights and drinkies with the Hubby!  Click here for more girly.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Close-up

So, um, I bet you didn't expect to see my cat again so soon, did you?




Yeah, well, sorry.  He's just so SWEET when he's asleep and that's the only time I could get this close.

At least it's not a bird, MikeWJ.

For more closeness that you may or may not want, see Ziva, who lives far, far, away.....at least from here. 

Monday, September 9, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Disguise

You're back?  You must be nuts!  Good.  You'll fit right in with the rest of us.

You have now entered an asylum disguised as a blog.  Evil Twin heard about today's prompt and immediately staged this lazy critter hiding its identity:



For other guises and disguises, visit Ziva.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Texture

Since we do a lot of home projects and our friends are undergoing a major home renovation, my first thought was wall texture.  Exciting stuff, right?  Um, no, not around here.  You are fortunate.  I will not be presenting a photo of our wall or ceiling texture, much to Evil Twin's disappointment.  What I do have for you is a photo of one of the SEVEN pine trees growing in my front yard that I did not plant.  They came from my neighbor's pine tree, as far as I can tell. After I took the photos for yesterday's prompt, I realized that because everything is green (YEA!), they just disappeared.  This photo, though, shows a little depth, a little texture, and will have the honors for today's prompt:

This is the largest of the pines.  I'm so proud of it!


For other textures, wall or otherwise, go to Ziva's house.

Saturday, September 7, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Seven

I had the best intentions:  a Triple-7 jet landing at D/FW,  the triple-7s on my mom's slot machine when she won a jackpot (It would have been a photo of her photo as YES, she did win a jackpot recently!), or seven of this or that to woo you with my photographic skills. 

Ha!

But, um, no.  Here's what you get:

 Yes, there is a cat flying a goose and a cat wearing red boots.  What more could you ask for?

Cat likes it.

Oh, and, no, there aren't many appointments on this calendar.  Cat is usually laying on it. 

If you want more sevens and maybe some lucky sevens,  you'll have to check-in with Ziva.


Friday, September 6, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Two Birds, One Stone

I was pulling my best nosy neighbor impression (think Mrs. Cravitz from Bewitched) and what do I see but my stone birdbath......with customers!

Yea!  Yea!  Two Birds, One Stone is done!  Cat missed the bathing and drinking party.  He was looking for his pet squirrel.



I was lazy and took the photo through the window screen on a bright, sunny afternoon.  I had to use a bit of sepia to give it some interest.

Other birds and stones can be found here.



Thursday, September 5, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Mushroom

Evil Twin tried to get me up early this morning so we could post our mushroom photo.  I wasn't so inclined.  She found this "treasure" in my display cabinet.  I can't remember where I got this thing but I think I was a child at the time, and, apparently, already showing signs of all-things-geek.



Um.....it's shaped like a mushroom!

Here's the top:


Click on that ugly face and see it in all its glory.

I'm thinking Aztec symbols.  As for the mushroom shape, coincidence?

Sigh. 

Stop laughing Evil Twin.

You want more?  Seriously? 

Ok-dokey.  Mushroom madness.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Backwards

I may be getting desperate already.  I'm presenting you with a photo of a door today.  Yes, a door.

Some say I'm backwards.  The kitchen is to my left.  
A window and then an outside wall is to my right.  
The grill lies just beyond me on the back porch.  
Why must I open into my homeowners carrying food?  
I think I should open the other way.

UPDATE:  My "backwards" is the left vs. right opening door, rather than in or out.  Yeah, Evil Twin is trying to confuse you.  I think the door should have the knob on the left and open right.

Sigh.

You want to join this madness?  Read about how Mike and Ziva blame each other for the topics.

Other photos:  Ziva's Backwards.

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Soft

Me. Me. Me.  This event is about ME.

Well, at least today it is!

I saw the female put the soft cushy things 
in this large container.  I shall guard them.  
Oh, and I'm soft, too.

Sigh.  Yeah, soft in the head.

You want to join this madness?  Read about how Mike and Ziva blame each other for the topics.

Other photos:  Ziva's lair.

Monday, September 2, 2013

30 Days of Photograhps IV - Illuminate

It was a nice walk on a hot day.  She was grateful for the shade of this huge pecan tree.  Then she realized she was the target and the light marked the spot........



She melted into a giant blob (I had originally typed blog), absorbed by the earth in a matter of seconds.

Oops.  It is not safe to be the enlightened one.

I hope you will forgive Evil Twin.  She comes from the dark side and has a warped sense of humor.  For awesome photography, go see Ms. Ziva.  Her post will direct you to the great ones.


Sunday, September 1, 2013

30 Days of Photographs IV - Ice Cream

Who wants ice cream?

Cat nods.

Evil Twin, well, um, here's what she did:

"I SCREAM!  I SCREAM!  I SCREAM FOR......."



Yeah, we get it, Evil Twin.

Sheesh.  What a little pill.

For more photos, and details on this tortuous endeavor, visit Ziva and Mike.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Got wheels?

"You've had a loaner car before, right?"

"Yes."

I get in the running car and the cold air is blasting on this RAINY Texas morning and the seat is all the way back.  Obviously, a giant drove this car before me. An unfamiliar panel greets me with a frown.  Evil Twin starts to snicker.  


"Do you know about the red button to start the car?"

"Um, no."

More snickering.

I'm starting to take deep breaths afraid to touch anything for fear of the car spontaneously combusting right there killing everyone, including the couple stuck behind me waiting to leave the service area.  I quickly make seat adjustments and cut the air off (unbelievable in Texas, really) and practice using the red button.  Finally, I'm ready to leave.  I inadvertently put the car in second and drive off.  Evil Twin is roaring with laughter and I didn't know why.  It's raining and fortunately the wipers work like my car, except I can't find the rear window wiper.  Nope.  Not there...or there...or there.  Evil Twin is about to pop a rib.  She sounds like a hyena.  She finally tells me that I'm driving a sedan not a SUV and there is NO rear wiper.  

Oh.

Later, I realize I'm driving around in second gear and yes, I changed it to drive and safely made my way home. 

I wish Evil Twin could can her evil laughter and sell it. It might help pay for the repairs to my poor vehicle.


Wow.  It's been awhile since I've posted.  We've had the typical Texas summer, hot but with some rain here and there which has helped tremendously.  Well, except for the poor folks whose homes were struck by lightning Sunday night.  Sigh.  I've been working around the house, primarily doing some painting, cleaning, and culling in our "junk" room.  I ran a half marathon in June and a sprint triathlon in July.   I think I need a nap.


Wednesday, June 5, 2013

The Cat Thinks His Book Will Sell.....

I'm back.  Finally.  It's been crazy around here.  The female is spending hours outside in my yard trying to make it pretty and she spends the rest of her time doing something she calls exercising.  That crazy girl.  That sounds too much like work! I've finally cornered Evil Twin to help me post excerpts from my biography.  I'm moving forward with it even though Evil Twin tells me absolutely nobody cares what a cat does every day.

Pfffft.  Of course they do.  Cats rule.

My day starts when the sun goes down, after I settle the humans in front of the hypnotic colorful box and I take my post-dinner, pre-long-snooze nap.  I engage the female in play.  She needs the exercise and she needs to think that she is stimulating my brain by interacting with me.  Sometimes she tosses a stupid toy mouse in the air for me to jump, spin, and catch.  I acts like I'm having fun and run from doorway to doorway to wait for the next toss.  Then the humans start to fidget.  They go into this place where things that look and sound like my kibble are consumed.  I am determined to get one before they put it in their mouths.  Greedy humans!  I'll tell you a secret, though.  I got one of those darned things last week when they weren't looking.  I destroyed it and its insides were spread all over the bathroom floor.  I think the female was worried. She followed me around like I was going to puke or die or something.  Sheesh.  She grumbled while she cleaned up the dead kibble.

Silly Oreo Kitty, it was just a Niacin tablet, nothing to worry about.  

I have no idea what she is talking about.

There is more play when we finally get upstairs to my comfy cushion that I share with the humans.  I jump on the giant cushion, landing on the plastic sack and attack the silver snake and the sack at the same time.  I am INCREDIBLE!  Eventually, the snake dies and the female buries it somewhere.   I finally settle the humans and take a quick snooze before my duties begin.  Once the humans are growling uncomfortably,  I make my way to the kitchen to redo the female's cleaning of the countertops and stovetop. 


I'm tired and hungry now.  I'll have to continue later.


"1.00s, 1.50s, 1.75s for the short arms. If you know what I'm talking about, you're probably old, too."

"Boomer brain fog: What was the last, middle, and first part of what you just said to me?"