When the Wind Blows.....

We've been having some nice weather down here in Texas. It's been really windy, though. There's crap blowing all over the place and I'm digging some very strange things out of my flower beds.


It's windier than being on the 99th floor of the Sears tower in Chicago and feeling the building sway back and forth.....back and forth.......You get the picture.

ReformingGeek pictures herself running for the stairwell and making it down to the 1st floor in 15 minutes flat........Then she pukes.

I'm scared of heights. I'm not sure I could go to the 99th floor of any building much less one that is moving back and forth.


Anyway, the nice weather blew THE YARD NAZI out from under her rock. Now before I rant about the NAZI, I will say that we have some great neighbors and I wouldn't want to live anywhere else right now.

This neighbor is always in her yard. Her yard is nice but she always has advice and I've heard it all.......at least six times. She "loaned" me gardening books last fall. No. I didn't ask. She just brought them over. Hum.......

She is also a drama queen.

Late last summer, I'm all comfy on my sofa reading your blog posts. Hubby is watching TV. I hear a very fast-paced "knock, knock, knock, knock......knock, knock, knock,knock,knock" on my back door. It was loud and almost staccato. I recognized the knock. It was either her or Chicken Little as it sounded like the sky must be falling.

I was hopeful that it was the pool guy or at least Kiefer or even Jack the Ripper.


DAMN! It IS her and she's got a wild, panicked look on her face.

Neighbor: "Do you have water running?"
Me: "Um, no."
My Evil Twin: Yeah. I'm in the shower with Hubby. Do you mind?

Neighbor: "I've got a puddle near my backdoor and I thought it must be coming from your house/yard since you're uphill."
Me: Um, no. [Insert plastic smile.] Maybe next door. Let's go check.
My Evil Twin: I thought your yard looked dry so I ran a fire hose to the property line and turned it on.


It was my next door neighbor's hose, accidentally left on all afternoon, and she was in her house oblivious to the "drama" unfolding around her.

I breathe a sign of relief. Another life-altering crises avoided.

So she gave me gardening books. I looked at the books and then they sat in my bay window all winter. Oops. It looks like my evil twin took over.

When I do training runs, I pass YARD NAZI'S house. Of course she's outside. She's always outside. I have my ipod on, earbuds in place, and it's playing some rawking tunes as I labor my way past her house. She calls out. I call back "Hi" and something about the nice weather and keep on running. As I turn my back, I wipe away my "smile" and I hear her say something about her books. I also hear her husband coming up to her. He's probably calling her off. I mumble a thanks to myself and make a mental note to bake him a casserole or something.

Yeah, right.

Fast forward to Saturday. I'm all comfy on the couch reading your blog posts (Do you see a pattern here?) Hubby is watching TV and I hear "knock, knock, knock, knock......knock, knock, knock,knock,knock" on my back door.

I say nothing. Hubby gets up to answer.

DANG! She asks for me (She saw me outside earlier - must remember to wear disguise next time.)

I give her the books. She tells me a story I've heard before. She starts talking about the drainage issues (again). Hubby and I walk her outside and she finally blows away. I was about ready to use the "I've got something on the stove" excuse.

Actually, it wasn't that bad this time. Maybe because it's been 4 months since I've seen her.

I think I'd better get busy in the yard.

This post reminded me of the very funny Britcom Good Neighbors. I really liked Barbara and Tom and wanted them to do well. What's your favorite British Comedy?