Vehicular Virginity and Pipe Dreams

I can see spring as the light at the end of the long, cold tunnel although Hubby just told me that it's only the reflection of the landing beacons from the black helicopters circling our house.

[SIGH!]

With spring comes my birthday and although I don't really enjoy adding one to my current age, the alternative....well....is not so good. Anyway, when I think of my birthday, I remember getting my driver's license at age 16 and that made me think of my first car. (Yeah, my brain takes these wild, weird jumps.)

That's right. There's nothing like that first car that is all yours (complete with you having to pay for gas!) When I graduated from high school, my parents got me a 1980 Subaru with the lousiest A/C ever invented (what, it doesn't get hot in Japan?) It was cute and blue and I really loved it but I thought I was going to die every summer.

Actually, Mom would have preferred that I drive around in this:


I'm sure she tried to find one but became disillusioned at the pricing and availability and she probably would have freaked out if I told her I really did want to drive one.

So what was your first car?

Hubby's first car was something like this (thank you, Wiki, for the photo):


But it probably felt more like this:



If I had a kid, he/she would probably get this and the child would call me a STUPID DUMBASS TREE-HUGGING HIPPIE MOM STUPID DUMBASS for the rest of its life:



Back in high school, rich kids had something similar to this:


Yeah, baby. Now we're talking. I'm thinking why in the heck did I not date the guys driving Porsches?


Enough of that. What's your dream car?

I've always been fascinated with Herbie. What a cute little bug. And the driver....well...Hubby told me NOT to dye my hair that color.



Ah shucks. I kind of like it.

Hubby's mid-life crises dream car:


Hubby seemed confused as to why there are strangers in his car. I offered to replace the driver with his face and the front-seat passenger with a blow-up doll, but he gave me The Look. Oh well. He had his chance at fame but he turned it down.


Hubby's real mid-life crises car....um....vehicle:


So that's what it looks like. It is often seen from this perspective:



And, finally, Perspective Cat's dream car:


WTF? I'm speechless. That is so Not Happening.

There is no space in the garage.


Cheshire cat photo courtesy of talljoe on flickr under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial license. Porsche, SmartCar and Volvo c70 photos were "borrowed" from car sales websites. Remaining photos are the property of ReformingGeek. Please do not use without permission.

Save me from the season

I'm always keeping my eyes open for ideas for my posts. I could write about all the evil things I've done in my life but that would be even more boring than this post. I think I remember undressing my barbies and maybe even removing their arms and legs but nothing that would make the news.

Wait! I think I threw confetti on a cute boy's lawn in high school...

I just got back from my run in the park. I don't think I can feel my legs. With less than 2 miles to ago, this guy on a bike comes up to me and says "Hey, aren't you my yoga teacher?"

I'm thinking to myself I'm at mile 10. I'm really not presentable right now and this guy's name is Dave, I think. DAMN! It wasn't Dave. It took me a minute but I finally recognized him. He was in disguise wearing a helmet and sunglasses. I was hoping for a big crack in the ground to swallow me. That didn't happen. It's a small world sometimes.

OK. I hear you. Back to today's post. It's fall and I like fall, except for the leaves that "fall" off my oak trees that seem to have multiplied over the summer. It's nice to have a break from the heat but it's the colors that get my attention: orange, yellow, red, orange-red, etc. I've always wanted to buy pumpkins and hay to set out so my neighbors think that I actually have decorations. Last year I broke down and bought fake flowers and some dolls for my front porch. I made a little tea party. The neighbors must have liked what I did. Three houses up the street, they copied me.

This year, I had to have more. I needed something for the inside of the house. I'm home more than I like to admit and I get tired of looking at cat hair (Yeah I know I could vacuum but would you get serious here?). I bought more flowers and a scarecrow and arranged them in a vase. Martha Stewart would be proud!

But it just wasn't enough so I bought some small gourds. What was I thinking? Have you ever seen anything uglier? Most of them have some serious pimple problems and well....just look at the pictures.

I named them. I'll warn you. Hubby thinks I'm incredibly silly sometimes.

He's probably right.

I'd like to introduce you to NICE BUNS!

I couldn't bring myself to name this one although all sorts of ideas came into my mind. I finally came up with

HUM...

The stripes give this guy away:

JAILBIRD

And finally, let's go back in time to the Road Runner cartoons and the wonderful ACME company:

BOOM!

Yes, it's supposed to be a bomb.

The rest were too ugly for photos. They killed my scarecrow, may she rest in peace.

These gourds remind of the Beer episode of the British Comedy Blackadder, Season 2. Specifically, Baldric and his confusion about a turnip. I loved Season 2. Hugh Laurie (Dr. House) is in the last two episodes. Catch it if you can.

Enough said. I guess I should get back to ignoring all the leaves that are falling out of the trees.