It's Bullocks and Discombobulation!

It was just another week in paradise or maybe it was in Geekville.  I can't remember.  I do know that it is Friday, the weather is gorgeous, and a busy weekend awaits!

The rude and obnoxious alarm goes off this morning making its usual repetitive chirping noise.  Hubby stirs and then lets out a big bear groan.  Unfortunately, I don't think he was awakening from a dream involving the potentially available Sandra Bullock.   I reminded Hubby that it was Friday and the bear calmed and started to purr. 

Yes, I know that bears don't purr but maybe they vibrate when they sigh.  Hubby did get up leaving me for another hour of precious snore time.

Then, Ms. Spring redeemed herself.  I woke up feeling all out of sorts.  I didn't sleep well.  Hum....maybe I was wrestling Sandra Bullock for my husband's attentions.

Anywhatsit, I felt discombobulated, my head no longer attached to my body but floating around like a gaseous ghost high on paint fumes.

Driving to work, I was greeted with this, which only intensified my out of body experience:

Yeah, I WISH!  Those are from Yellowstone, courtesy of rickz on flickr.com but our local ponds were steamy and with pink and orange from the morning sun, I now know what SERENITY looks like!

And me without me camera.

For shame.

I'm better now.  My class is done.  Nobody died and my CPR skills were not needed.  PHEW!    My swim is over.  I'm glad I did it even though I felt every inch of the pool and was struggling with my breathing.  I took a few shots of chlorinated water when the guy in the next lane started his butterfly stroke.   

Thanks, Dude.  That's not the drink I really wanted.   Could you have gotten me a coffee or at least a green tea?

This swimmer attended my class prior to his swim so we know each other.  I think he may have been picking on me or paying me back for that last set of push-ups.

Sigh.

In other goofiness,

One of the swimmers in the recent triathlon mentioned she was going to wear a swim cap to keep her hair dry.

Um, no Sweetie. It doesn't work that way.  I certainly wish it did.

A friend of mine was almost stopped in the middle of a half marathon BY A TRAIN CROSSING!

What idiot designed THAT route?

A woman leaves her baby in her SUV to avoid it being repossessed.

Words cannot describe....

People make such great blog fodder.

Have a great weekend!

Injustice is Only a Few Ticks Away

I can't believe there is so much injustice in the world. Maybe that's why Humor Bloggers Dot Com has declared this month to make fun of injustice in any way we possibly can. That's why I'm back to do my part and no, today's topic is not about those blood-sucking mini-vampires that attack warm, moist, hairy bodies in the summer time.

Hum...It was warm here last week.

Excuse me while I go do a body check.


OK. All clear. Back to the post.


I'm referring to my poor neglected timepiece. That's right. My watch. I used to wear Miss Minnie all the time but since she stopped ticking and only shows the correct time twice a day, I stopped wearing. I haven't missed her much. Around the house I use my oven clock or the computer clock or even the clock on one of several telephones.

In a geek perfect world, all the house clocks would be synchronized. But they're not. Not even close. I think we have one thermostat clock that is about 20 minutes off. Note to self: FIX THAT TODAY.

In the car, there's a clock. At the gym, clocks, clocks everywhere, and, no, none of them are reporting the same time.


That reminds me of a group activity that we did as part of a beginning fitness instructor training class. We had to draw a picture of the perfect instructor. Everyone always drew her/him wearing a watch because we all knew that good instructors wore watches to make sure they accurately start and end class. This is in the old days before you could say "What time is it?" and a handheld device would answer you back.

ReformingGeek yawns in memory of that particular training class.

What else did we draw on that poor model? I'm glad you asked. We drew the hair pulled back out of the face and the model was wearing appropriate clothing and shoes. (Sorry guys, no boobs popping out.)

I'll take a guess at what some of you guys would draw on a female instructor model: Revealing clothing and..... Forget that. She would be nude with big boobs and voluptuous curves. The ladies would show the guy model with six-pack abs and striking a sexy pose, right?

I cheated and substituted the following photo for my instructor model:


I was pulled aside for a little chat. Sigh. I had to conform. Now THAT was an injustice.

As for my lonely timepiece, I could get a new battery for Ms. Minnie but I think I need a LARGE PRINT version. DANG! That's another injustice.

It never stops....tick, tick, tick.

Photo: Will Smith and Ms Minnie were coughed up by the magic of the Google.

Be my favorite student!

I teach group fitness classes and thru the years I've seen some really weird behavior in the classes. I currently teach yoga but I've taught my share of step/cycling/aerobics classes in the past. Unless you want to be a topic at the next Fitness Instructor Happy Hour, avoid the following:

1. Competition for Position - This person sets up camp in the same place during each class. This is usually OK. Obviously this person likes the spot for some reason. But this can become a problem if they are challenged by a newcomer for the "spot". Girl fighting may commence.
2. Puddles (not a dog's name, folks) I know. You guys can really sweat and some of you ladies can too. Bring a towel and wipe it up before somebody slips and falls. I don't want to practice my First-Aid or CPR skills. If you used equipment, please wipe it off. Last but not least, deodorant and clean clothes (at least to start) will make class a little more fun for all of us.
3. Stare-Off - This is the participant that sets up directly in front of the instructor. Each time the instructor looks up, there they are. OK, I'm not scared up there anymore but this can be really nerve-racking and makes it harder for me to see anyone else......hum....maybe that's the point.
4. Look at My Hot Bod! - For the ladies, real, fake, whatever. I don't need to see their outline in that tight-fitting top or popping out of whatever you thought was appropriate attire today. And, guys, loose-fitting shorts in yoga...commando..need I say more? And guys, contrary to popular belief, tight thin bike shorts outlining your anatomy do not turn me on.
5. Independent Thinker - Hey, this is usually a good thing but in step class with the instructor giving direction, showing off your own moves can be very distracting, especially when you fall doing that reverse-turn-hop-straddle thing ;-).
6. Leave it at the door - Your phones, pagers, and other technology that can make cute little noises during class. Even worse if you answer the damn thing.

I'm sure we've all been guilty of weird behavior at one time or another and if you see yourself as one these characters, roll your eyes and have a little laugh at yourself. If you don't, I will.