Dang! The Paparazzi have found me.
Wait. Don't leave. It's me. ReformingGeek. Don't you want to interview me?
No? You were looking for someone famous and important?
Oh. Um..those Jonas Dudes live somewhere around here. I think you missed a turn somewhere.
Fine. I'll just interview myself with this set of unrelated, totally insane questions:
Q. The Grim Reaper has designated you to die providing a meal for another creature. You get to choose the creature from the list below:
d. Feral Cats
None of the above.
That was one crazy question. I hope the rest aren't near that bad....
None of the above was NOT a choice.
Sorry. No comment then. That's really gross. Who made up these stupid questions anyway?
What's the next question?
Q. Your husband has told me that you....er....pass gas too much. Why do you think that you have this problem?
Bathroom humor? How creative.
Oh. You want me to answer that.
Hum...I guess he's saying I fart more than he does. Fancy that. He's probably right. What can I say? I like beans, onions, garlic, and vegetables.
Sheesh. What's that smell?
Oh, sorry. I couldn't help it. I had onions on my sandwich at lunch.
Let's just move on, OK?
Q. A former co-worker mentioned that you talk loud on the telephone.
Oh, you ARE kidding, right? I have a soft voice with a southern drawl.
Oh, you're serious? Well.... I guess I get louder when I get excited and I remember some very exciting conference calls. Also, I teach fitness classes. I GOT USED TO RAISING MY VOICE.
OK. OK. Take a deep breath and we'll continue.
Q. What is your favorite color?
No. I'm kidding.
Ha! Fooled you.
[ReformingGeek glares at interviewer.]
Er.....why don't we just continue. OK?
Q. Why do you blog, RG?
Heck if I know. What does my profile say? See it? It's right there on the second sidebar. That is, Abdul's second sidebar. That's right. Abdul developed the template. He even signed his name at the very bottom of the page. Actually, I'd like to have a little chat with Abdul. He left a few things out. Simple things such as how do a list that actually shows the bullet points and comment code that actually works and changing the font back to the default after you use block quote....
Can we get back to the interview?
Oh, sorry. Sure. Go ahead.
Q. Are you doing anything special for your blogiversary?
Is that like an adversary? I don't want to be confrontational. I get in trouble for that.
Um, no. You don't have to worry about that. It's the anniversary of when you did your first post.
Oh, that. I don't know. It's in September, right before I go on vacation. My brains will be totally fried by then. Maybe I'll post a picture of a balloon and a cake or something.
Um, yeah. That's sounds exciting. Snicker.
Q. Are you going to take the next step in social networking where you can video yourself blabbering on about whatever?
Heck, no. I know I'm narcissistic but not THAT much. Besides, the camera might make my
Yeah. You know. That social networking tool that both me and my evil twin can use with the same account. I love it. I never know who I'm gonna be that day. Tic. Tic.
Um, yeah. Sweetie, did you take your meds today?
Tune in some other time for the next set of questions