Monday, May 17, 2010

Mile High Morning Roasted Over a Texas Heat Wave


The weather is warming up and sure enough, after seeing a forecast for rain and not getting any, I criticized Mother Nature.  The payback was a bitch. She had me for lunch.  That's right.  She sent me a monsoon at lunchtime on Friday.  My yard was a lake and the trees pooped all over the place.

These warmer temps and higher humidity have not helped my half-marathon training.  The race is in June.  I know.  Why in GOD/BUDDHA/OTHER's name did I sign up for a race in June in Texas?

Don't answer that.

Yesterday's long run at the park was brutal. Two tortoises passed me while they were humping each other.  I was starting to become frightened of the circling turkey vultures.  SHEESH!

 

Even though I've had a busy week, Evil Twin, Cat, and I found time to resume our paparazzi spying and now have some dirt on a fellow blogger.  

This blogger made the mistake about whining about not getting any blog bling.  MikeWJ, over at Too Many Mornings, will now be tenderized, seasoned, and roasted by the Geek clan.



Michael has told me he works for the National Park Service.  I can't imagine they let him work there with this hairstyle:

Yeah....when can you start?


His son plays hockey.  It appears that his son practices with Dad and Dad got the short end of the stick:

Three cheers for the red, white, and blue.

Finally, Michael lives in a mountainous state and loves to pursue some interesting hobbies:

 Um....nice...um...bone?

Yep.  That's the scoop.

Now that Michael has been cooked and served, he is welcome to enjoy some blog bling:


I hope he will display it proudly!

For previous geek roastings, please check the sidebar.

Be careful out there.  You never know when Evil Twin, Cat, and I will be sleuthing.

Photo credits: Piercings: Alex the greek, flickr.com, Cast: Patrick Powers, flickr.com, Ranger: Ralphleon, flickr.com; all courtesy of Creative Commons license (see sidebar), Spy Girl: owned by Reffie.

36 comments:

Ziva said...

That was hilarious! And I can't believe it, but Mike looks exactly the way I pictured him, tattoos and piercings and all.

Marissa said...

heheh. Your photos are always so fitting. Here in L.A., that's a good look for Mike.

Quirkyloon said...

*smacking lips*

Pretty tasty!

But you know me, I always like it hot, hot, hot!

Mike could use some jalapenos.

Just sayin'.

*grin*

ReformingGeek said...

@Ziva - Thanks. Yeah, no big surprise, huh?

@Marissa - Mike might appreciate some LA weather!

@Quirky - You're right. Let's add some more jalapenos and some green chiles!

Leeuna said...

Bwahahaha. Reffie, you three sure did a number on Mike. What a great roast! Oh, and did you send your rain up my way? It rained all night here. It sounded like it was saying "reffie" on our roof. ???

meleah rebeccah said...

I am new to reading MikeWJ blog over at Too Many Mornings - but he is REALLY funny from what I've read so far, and I have no doubt he will love this blog post you wrote for him!

ReformingGeek said...

@Leeuna - Thanks. Hee Hee. Sorry about that rain. It's to rain here again, too.

@meleah - I hope so!

Mrsblogalot said...

And you roast too? I had no idea. I must go over and check him out. And it's like you read my mind on the God/other thing...amazing.I was just riding that train of thought.

I love it when I have awesome company on the train (-:

00dozo said...

I didn't get a chance to read your post today. Sorry. In the meantime, I did remember you in my post today (please drop by), and will return here soon.

Lauren said...

I will check him out, too. Did Evil Twin take the pictures? I ask because of the photo of the intact bone and presumably broken bone swaddled in a cast. Btw, did anyone stick a fork in him to see if he was done?

ReformingGeek said...

@MrsBlogalt - Choo Choo! I love trains.

@00dozo - Wow, thanks!

@Lauren - Evil Twin bit him. He was done. I have to take the photos. She tends to break cameras.

honeypiehorse said...

That may be the best description of a difficult run I have ever read.

Funnyrunner said...

ooh yeah. I suck at running in hot weather. Why DID you sign up for a June half marathon in Texas? silly woman. I've always heard the Annapolis 10-miler around here is a great race, but it's in AUGUST. Funnyrunner does not RACE 10 miles in August. lol. She only does 20+ long runs to train for fall marathons. lol.

My runs have sucked lately, too - except for yesterday because I finally just went out without a prescribed workout and just RAN.

good luck!!

ReformingGeek said...

@honeypie - Thanks...I think. ;-)

@Funnyrunner - Yeah, summer running is a challenge!

00dozo said...

You're welcome Reffie!

Haha - funny roast - great post! Trust me, I won't be whining about bling in my blog anytime soon! I didn't see his whine comment, but he's now got more than he bargained for.

mama-face said...

humping tortoises...lol and ew.

humidity makes everything more difficult and unenjoyable...even for tortoises.

Lindzena said...

Ha! This made me laugh. We're getting a ton of rain too. We start getting ducks in the lawn at the park. And I am sure that turkey vultures are a horror to any and all runners, seasoned or otherwise. Wear a helmet!

meleah rebeccah said...

Im back to check if Mike's seen this yet?

Deb said...

Can you strap a personal air conditioner on to you for that race in June? Will Hubby be there to sop you up when you melt into a puddle?

Mike is great! I've ordered an "I Like Mike" button to proudly display next to my Panic Button and Easy Button.

dana said...

You grabbed me with your first paragraph: trees pooped in your yard huh....riot reading!

ReformingGeek said...

@00dozo - Mike whined on my previous post.

@mama-face - Yeah, those poor creatures were tired.

@Lindzena - A helmet is not a bad idea!

@meleah - No Mikey yet. I just stopped by his place and left him a note.

@Deb - Hubby will probably be asleep! I want a button, too.

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Uhmm, yummy, do I smell a roast? Because I love roast, especially with gravy and some Yorkshire puddin....WAIT A TEXAS TORNADO! I'M THE ROAST?!?

Very funny, Reffie, Evil Twin and Cat (I knew cats couldn't be trusted)! Sure, go ahead and mock me, but I WILL NOT BE MOCKED! (Please read the previous line in John Malkovich's most intense voice).

Allow me to cleverly refute your witty spearings.

1) I don't have a single piercing or tattoo on my face or neck. The only tattoo I have reads, "Rosie's Diner" or "Eat At Rosie's 24-Hour Diner--Albuquerque, New Mexico," depending on how happy I am to see you.

2) I have never broken my leg playing hockey because I can’t skate. I proved this in high school, when Wendy Fawcett asked me out on a date to the roller rink, and I spent the next 2 hours trying not to fall on her, even though falling on her was pretty much all I actually wanted to do.

3) I've never killed a deer. Many squirrels, yes. But no deer. Still, sure, okay, you can use the word “boney” to describe me, I’ll give you that. I am the writing dead, after all—as you can plainly see—and I didn’t get the Rosie’s Diner tattoo just because I liked her pie.
Still, all in all, I’m honored to be roasted, Reffie, so thank you. Oh, and expect many happy returns, but when you least expect it.
Also, I apologize for taking so long to get over here. I’ve basically been dead for about a week now. Not writing. Not commenting. Too much work, too much school, too many kids, too few brain cells. Just now starting to recover……

P.S. -- I'm trying to figure how Deb's "I Like Mike" button fits in between "Easy" and "Panic" buttons. I'm not sure whether to feel complimented or worried.

The Queen said...

Hey geek... that is just way too funny... or.. I've had to much gin.. I'll tell ya tomorrow when I re-read it.. sober..

wait.. I don't do sober..

We'll just go with it's damn funny!

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

"Two tortoises passed me while they were humping each other."

Bwa-HAHAAHA!!!!

Also? I don't think that guy's hair should stop him from getting a job as much as all the piercings and tattoos - Yikes!

ReformingGeek said...

@MikeWJ - I love your response. Thanks for having fun with it!

@The Queen - Thanks....I think.

@Nanny - I hear that people actually show up for interviews looking like that.

otin said...

I am still laughing over the humping turtles! hahaha

Anything Fits A Naked Man said...

I wish I could write in a style as hilarious as yours! Just so great, Geek!

I'm with the others, humping turtles and trees pooping in your yard? CLASSIC!!

Thanks for another great, fun post!

ReformingGeek said...

@otin - Humping turtles are funny! ;-)

@Anything - You are so kind! Thank you.

Ivy said...

Awesome! I love a good roasting! :)

Send some of that sun and heat our way! It's done nothing but rain for over a week... I think I'll regret saying that. I'm ready for you Mother Nature.. with my bikini and sunscreen! Bring it!

The Old Silly said...

Sorry I haven't been by in a while ... hey Michael looks just like me!

Jean Knee said...

I was going to leave a witty remark on here but have finally had to admit....I'm not witty

Leeuna said...

Hey Reffie, I gave you an award. Come by my blog today and pick it up if you have time. :)

ReformingGeek said...

@Jean - Oh, Jean Knee-Joint, you are the Queen of Wit!

@Leeuna - Uh oh.... ;-)

Jen said...

This is hilarious! I love Mike's boner, I mean bone, erm, antler? Great roast!

ReformingGeek said...

@Ivy - Thanks. Sorry about the rain. I hope you get a sunburn (mild) soon.

@Marvin - Michael looks like you? Uh oh.

@Jen - Thanks. Yeah, that's some bone...

The ConstantComplainer said...

MikeWJ, you need to earn your blog bling, bro.


"1.00s, 1.50s, 1.75s for the short arms. If you know what I'm talking about, you're probably old, too."

"Boomer brain fog: What was the last, middle, and first part of what you just said to me?"