Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Shoot Me on Fat Tuesday


Happy FAT TUESDAY! It's been quite a party around the ReformingGeek household today already. You can see that from the empty bottles and the numerous beads that I somehow earned. Click on the photo if you want to examine the empty tequila bottles!

Hum......not sure how I earned the beads but I'll get back to that in a minute.

You've probably seen the living will that is going around in an email. Here's my version (just in case I'm in some kind of a tequila coma or something):

I, ReformingGeek, being of sound mind and body (Um.....), do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of Doogie Howser lawyers/doctors interested in simply running up the bills.

If a reasonable amount of time passes (about 5 to 10 minutes) and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Glass of wine
Chocolate, Margarita
Sex
Cookies
My laptop and blogroll
Margarita
LOL Cats
Cold Beer
Chocolate
Diet Dr Pepper
Mexican food
My vibrator
Mexican food
My laptop and blogroll
Fudge
French fries
Chocolate
Quirky's Axe
Glass of Wine
Garden Spade
Pizza
Sex
Cookies
Kiefer
My laptop and blogroll
Ice cream
Cup of tea
Mexican food
Chocolate
Glass of wine
Sex
LOL Cats
My shotgun
Iced Tea (I'm from Texas, Get Over It!)
Margarita

It should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is reached, pull the plug, strangle me with the beads, or just shoot me. Life ain't worth living.

Earn you beads today, folks.


Later in the week I'll be taking the podium thanking Quirky and Kirsten for their kind words and bloggy tags and awards. Of course this has to be done with my own insane perspective so consider yourself warned!

ReformingGeek's bead photo was taken by Perspective Cat after he drank most of the tequila. I'm not proud. You can have the photo. No rights reserved. The Scarf Boobies photo was taken by God Knows Who and is currently floating around the Interwebs.

23 comments:

dizzblnd said...

HEYYYYYYYYYYYY You drank all the tequila before I could get there! WTH? I love your will.. I will be sure to look for those signs in your upcoming blogs.. you should just randomly insert some of those requests.

I want some of them boobies.. those are hilarious

quirkyloon said...

Oh my gawsh!

This is freakin' hilarious. My axe? I didn't realize what an impact my axe had on ye!

You are so funny and too too cute!

And um maybe for your next give away you could give away some of those boobs! I know I could use um, one, I mean two! HA!

Queen-Size funny bone said...

nice boobies. where can I get me some of those to wrap around my neck.

ReformingGeek said...

@dizzblnd - Don't worry. We will have plenty of tequila on hand for the party.

@quirky - Thanks. Glad you noticed your axe made an appearance. I love your axe.

Yeah. I could use some serious boobies myself!

ReformingGeek said...

@Queen-size fb - I bet we could google/oogle/or ogle them!

♥georgie♥ said...

LMFAO!!!! the list, the pic too friggin funny!

Bee said...

I don't think you mentioned 'sex' enough so I will do it for you and hopefully get you some interesting searches.

SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX

HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES HORSE WHORES

Hope it works! ;o)

ReformingGeek said...

@georgie - Thanks. Those ladies look reasonably amused.

@Bee - Uh....thx. SEX

Marissa said...

(Cue the music) "Do your boobs hang low, do they wobble to and fro, can you tie them in a knot, can you tie them in a bow..."

FrankandMary said...

That is one of the most sensible "determination of quality of life" lists I've ever seen.
~Mary

ReformingGeek said...

@Marissa - I like that!

@Mary - Absolutely. Thanks.

Deb said...

The scarves take the cake...er the tequila. What a riot!

Happy Obese Tuesday, otherwise known as HOT!

Elizabeth said...

I forgot it was Fat Tuesday, I'm going out right now to get me my tequila!

dani c said...

I'm loving the boobies, can I get a pair ?

ReformingGeek said...

@Deb - If those ladies had been wearing beads, it would have been even better.

@Elizabeth - Go for it!

@dani - There seems to be enough to go around!

Chris Wood said...

Horses & whores go together, do they? Ummmm ....

But those boob scarves are excellent!

Jacki said...

Our lists are pretty comparable. :-) Especially the sex.

ReformingGeek said...

@Chris - I don't know about the horses. I'll be sure to send you a scarf for your next birthday!

@Jacki - Absolutely!

Jean Knee said...

scarf boobies, hmmmmmm.....

Nooter said...

when those ladies get real old they can unwind the extra loop around their neck and drop those teets down to their waistlines hee hee

ReformingGeek said...

@Jean - Well, when you don't have any, you make them up.

@Nooter - Hey, don't make fun of my wittle boobies going south.

The Constant Complainer said...

I enjoyed your post. First time visitor. Saw your link on another blog and decided to check it out.

I'm not going to say what I had to do to get some beads yesterday...

And yes, that was quite a bit of alcohol in that basket.

Thanks,
The Constant Complainer
Cleveland

ReformingGeek said...

@Constant Complainer - Thanks. Come back soon.

Whatever you did to get beads, I hope it was worth it!


"1.00s, 1.50s, 1.75s for the short arms. If you know what I'm talking about, you're probably old, too."

"Boomer brain fog: What was the last, middle, and first part of what you just said to me?"