Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Injustice Exposed: And the Password Is...

Thanks to all of you that commented on my Veterans Day post. What a great response and shout out for veterans. Now I must look for some funny. I love to laugh but one can only look at so many cute animal pictures and watch so much Big Bang Theory and 2.5 Men and a Baby.

Uh, ReformingGeek?

Yes.

That's not the name of the show.

I know. I'm trying to make a joke. Would you just laugh already?


Do you ever feel you are on the outside looking for the inside? Are you wanting to know how to fit in or are you figuring out if you even care about finding your niche in life? Everyone else is a member of some special "club" and you are....er....well.....just you.

Well?

This post will answer none of those questions.

As part of the fight against injustice, I've joined forces with Humor Bloggers Dot Com to expose the greatest criminal organizations in the history of our country.

That's right. I've discovered that this country is full of secret societies and they all have some special means of communication that is baffling to the common geek:

1. Country Folk.

When you live in the country, and you encounter a neighbor while driving, you give "the country wave", a full wave if you're a plebe or a slight head nod or finger lift if you're an oldie.
That's right. A secret sign letting everyone know you're part of the club, just like them.

Wait. What club? I'm a little scared. I just watched the pilot of the new (new old show) V and we all now that there are zombies out there.


2. Jeep owners.


Apparently, all jeep owners have to wave or nod to each other while on the road. Hubby says "It's a Jeep thing. You wouldn't understand." Yeah, right. I think he stole that from a bumper sticker. Jeep owners seem to be part of a club that supports the tow truck industry.



3. Shrunken Car Red Hat Society.


Theses are the folks that drive Smart Cars and wear red hats.

Uh, ReformingGeek?

Yes.

Were they wearing purple with their red hats?

Oh, PU-LEASE! They weren't wearing red hats, OK? I'm just kidding. Let me get on with it, OK?

Anywho, these drivers are out of proportion compared to their cars, appearing as giants in too-small prisons. They look like they should be pushing those things around a Hot Wheels track. Not only do these folks wave or nod, they toot. No, I'm not talking about passing gas. They honk their horns at the other Smart Car drivers.

What the noise? They need to get over themselves before my mid-size SUV runs over them. What club are they in anyway? Some kind of hive? Are these just the scout cars I'm seeing?


4. The Masons


I have no clue. Like I said, it's a secret. I have no idea what these folks do behind closed doors. Maybe they try on women's underwear and take photos for Facebook.

Kidding. Kidding. Please do not throw mason jars at me, OK?

Yeah, I know that was bad.

5. Tree huggers.


Oh, wait. I should know this secret. I like trees and cute little animals and yoga, but I apparently didn't stand in the correct line to get the sign. I don't wear a turban, carry a PETA sign, or go around bowing and saying "Namaste" to everyone I meet.

Oh,well. I'm just a square geek in a round world.

**Sighs**

The injustice of it all.

Photo: The Internets coughed it up when I typed the secret code into the Google.

25 comments:

Deb said...

I think the Masons build stone walls in secret. Odd little club thing they have going on.

I'm nasty.

Wait. It's Namaste. I think.

Nooter said...

ha ha! if someone tooted in one of those little cars it would pop like an overinflated balloon

ReformingGeek said...

@Deb - I thought they just made jars. Sheesh.

@Nooter - I don't want to be around if/when that happens!

dana said...

Hey, aren't we in the same club? The one where we pass by each other and don't nod or wave? Like we're unaware of each other?

But secretly......so that no one notices.......we're patting our SUV's dashboard cuz we KNOW....we KNOW. heh heh

VE said...

Bet you didn't know I was a veteran, did you?

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Mason jars! So that's what cryptic, ring-wearing, brick layers are doing in those temples. I should've known!

Leeuna said...

Bwahahahha. Throwing mason jars at you. That was a funny one.

honeypiehorse said...

I resent that crack about turbans.

ReformingGeek said...

@dana - But don't tell, Dana, don't tell....

@VE - Yeah. That's why you're called VEteran.... ;-)

@MikeWJ - It seems so simple now, doesn't it?

@Leeuna - It was a little painful.


@honeypie - I'm sure your turban is beautiful....and warm....and....

Jean Knee said...

ha! I'm one of them country folk even though I live in a sub division.

don't judge

Brian O'Mara-Croft said...

I had almost forgotten about the "country wave"...thanks for bringing back painful memories.

Cheers!

Laughing and Prying Marv said...

Back to your typical hilarious form, I see - lol, loved this. Hey RG - I get the impression, reading your posts ... do you talk to yourself a lot? (wink)

The Old Silly

ReformingGeek said...

@Jean - Pot calling kettle....

@Brian - No problem. **nodding**

@Marvin - Thanks. Yes, of course I talk to myself a lot. The cat isn't much of a conversationalist and his opinions are very shallow and self-focused. Sheesh!

Yes, I do talk to Hubby, too.

Meadowlark said...

Well, you know how I feel about "clubs", I'm one of Uncle Sam's Misguided Children and we have the BEST. CLUB. EVER! :)

But I do miss the 'barely lift a finger off the steering wheel' wave from the ranch. Thanks for a smile.

Funnyrunner said...

First of all, Reforming Geek, thank you SO MUCH for being a loyal reader of my blog while my own blog reading habits have SUCKED lately. I appreciate it.

This post cracked me up - reminds me of the comedian Jim Gaffigan when he does "asides" at what he thinks the audience is thinking. It's hysterical.

ReformingGeek said...

@Meadowlark - You're welcome. Yeah. I left out the former military "clubs" on purpose. Maybe I'll roast them some other time.

@Funnyrunner - Thanks and you're welcome. I was hoping you would come back soon with your witty comments. I know you've been busy.

Skye said...

You don't want to know much about the Masons! All lawyers, judges, etc are part of that club. If you are a Mason and you do something wrong and get arrested for it, you give the secret nod or hand sign to show your status and chances are you get off scott free! It's no laughing matter, trust me! There are all kinds of people that are part of that club, but you don't get in unless you're in some official position. Not only law personell but also doctors, government officials, etc. They are the ones who run the world in secret and it's not a very pretty secret either.

Sorry to put a damper on your humorous post.

CatLadyLarew said...

Silly me... I grew up in the rural midwest where everyone raised their pointer finger off the steering wheel to salute passing motorists. So I grew up thinking that people raising one finger to me were just being friendly. It took me awhile to figure out that WHICH finger you used made a difference. No wonder I got into so much trouble in school.

ettarose said...

I have to admit I belong to the club of lifting one's finger as a nod. When I lived in Phoenix, I belonged to the club "run them over when they need it" club. You should be proud to belong to the best club ever, and that is the humorbloggers.com club!

ReformingGeek said...

@Skye - Yeah. They seem a bit scary sometimes.

@CatLady - Be careful with those fingers, Girl!

@Etta - Very true. The humor bloggers are a great club. I wouldn't want to poke fun at them, now would I? ;-)

Quirkyloon said...

Heh heh heh!

Funny post and yes it is ALL a huge injustice.

Now what's up with those Mason's?

I'm all curious now.

*smile*

I want in a secret society! Please? Can we make one up?

ReformingGeek said...

@Quirky - Yes. Let's make up our own secret society. That would be so fun. Should we allow non-bloggers?

mama-face said...

LMAO. This was the best; probably because I felt like I belonged. Finally. For Reals. Honestly.

I want that picture for the header on my blog. It's like the inside of my head. Take that however you want.

:)

ReformingGeek said...

@mama-face - Thanks. You are welcome to the picture. Your poor head!

The Constant Complainer said...

That Jeep owners' thing is weird. I really don't have time to be looking for others to waive at. LOL. I've never heard of that, with Jeeps at least!


"1.00s, 1.50s, 1.75s for the short arms. If you know what I'm talking about, you're probably old, too."

"Boomer brain fog: What was the last, middle, and first part of what you just said to me?"