Friday, May 22, 2009

I Spy a Front Porch

You can thank Meadowlark from Just Wandering Through for this post. She posted a picture of her very nice backporch and motivated her readers to write about their porches in order to win something. She didn't even tell us what we will win but apparently that didn't matter as you are now reading a post about a porch.

Actually, it was an incentive to clean which is something I've been putting off for awhile.

Thanks for that.

I have three porches. The one you are getting is the "front" porch which is NOT, I repeat, NOT the main entrance to our house. Curses to the goofs that built this house and made this an entry. We store luggage in front of this door as it's a little room behind the laundry room that contains all things sports and fitness plus anything else that doesn't have a "spot" The room is full but I at least managed to make a path for a yoga mat, and unfortunately, the ironing board. DANG!

Back to the porch. It has so many uses. Here we can sit to watch for the zombies and aliens, fox, deer, and cat meals bunnies to amuse us. We can spy on the neighbors using the technology on our laptops. We have a birds eye view of the silent black helicopters hovering at the neighbor's hangar across the street at night. We are not sure what he has in there and no, it's not an airplane. Night vision goggles work great.

Oops. I'm getting carried away. I really shouldn't divulge too much about my secret life as a spy.

What I mean is, we can watch the neighbors come and go, practicing our country wave, or we can watch them mow their lawns while we have a drinkie and kick back.

So here's the view:

As for the issue with the door, the prior owners had a hand-written sign indicating the direction of the real front door. Obviously, it could not be seen at night and I thought it looked silly so I took it down. I will usually just put something in front of the door but if you have any ideas for something a little more entertaining, I'm all ears or eyes or something like that.

When someone does ring that doorbell, we hear one chime inside ("ding") whereas if someone rings the real front doorbell, we hear two chimes ("ding-dong"). WOW! Wasn't that the most clever and exciting thing you've heard all day?

Oops. I'm sorry about that sarcasm. It takes over sometimes and usually gets me a shovel if you know what I mean.

The back porch is where we spend most of our time. Our grill is back there and we have a small table. There is a better view of the runway from there. The problem is that right now, it's being inhabited by giant lizards in the back corner where some leaves have accumulated obviously making a sweet, cozy nesting place. There may be something else back there, too:

Have a great holiday weekend!

Photo credits: ReformingGeek front porch and view: ReformingGeek's sad, sad attempts at photography, snake: arrived via email.


Anonymous said...

Aw - poor little birdie's gonna be breakfast of vipers, it seems. Fun post, Reforming One, loved it and the pics. I'm a porch hangout kind of guy myself. For the "front door" dilemma - install a camouflaged trap door just outside the "wrong" front door, that flips down when someone stands on it, plummeting them into an underground hydro-powered tunnel ride under the house and back to the surface in front of the correct front door.

You have to be a bit drastic with unobservant, rude and stupid visitors. Otherwise, they won't learn nothing.

The Old Silly from Free Spirit Blog

United Studies said...

It is a cute little place to sit, however. But totally doesn't look like a main entrance...more like a door off a bedroom or something.

We have a front porch, but no furniture yet.

ReformingGeek said...

@Marvin - Thanks. I love your idea. I'll get Hubby busy on the design right away.

@Jacki - That's right. It doesn't look like a main entrance but it's the first door people see if they are coming from the driveway area. We've talked about taking out the door but it's never been a priority.

Anonymous said...

Aw poor little birdy!

Nice view from the porch Reffie!

So you gonna tell us when that door has truly reformed? heh heh

Meadowlark said...

Thanks. I'm just nosy and for the record, I said it would be a lame-o prize, so there! :)

I love seeing everybody's view.

ReformingGeek said...

@Quirky - Yeah. Poor wittle thing. I doubt the door will every truly reform. ;-)

@Meadowlark - I'm a sucker and am always looking for material!

Nooter said...

you should dig a tiger pit in front of that door then when visitors fall into it make them pay you one dollar before you throw down a rope ladder. then point them to the real front door which, of course, has another tiger pit in front of it hee hee!

Suzanne said...

It's good to know that someone else is watching for zombies and aliens. It's hard to know the difference between them and the neighbors though, so keeping a steady watch on the neighbors is necessary. Keep up the good work!

ReformingGeek said...

@Nooter - That's sounds like a good idea to deter visitors! ROAR!

@Sue - Absolutely. No telling what they get up to 'round here.

Shawn said...

Some yellow crime scene tape should keep people far away from that door. Well, not the guys in the black helicopters, but everyone else.

Elizabeth said...

I love the view from your back porch. It looks so peacful. But were you serious about the giant lizards? Because that's kinda scary!

ReformingGeek said...

@Shawn - Yeah. That would be a great way to impress the neighbors. As for the helicopters, that may be a problem.

@Elizabeth - Thanks. It's very nice. It makes us feel like we are in the country although we really are not. As for the lizards, they are not "giant" but I saw one that was probably about 4 inches wide. I like lizards, though, so that doesn't bother me.

Unknown said...

Watch out little birdie! Your porch is very pretty. So is your yard.. even if we haven't helped you pick up the tree poop yet. I just came in from my front porch where I was FINALLY able to go out there without getting soaked.

It has rained here for a week straight here in the "Sunshine State."

I hope you win whatever she is offering!

Elizabeth said...

Yikes!! 4 inches wide is giant in my book! But it's good you like them so they can have a nice home in your backyard!

ReformingGeek said...

@dizzblnd - Thanks. We just got a nice rain and it looks like more is on the way. I think I'll just watch the lightning from inside the house.

@Elizabeth - Yeah. I don't like to disturb habitats if I can avoid it. Exception: fire ants. Those suckers can disappear anytime.

Marissa said...

4-inch wide! That's not a lizard, that's a baby alligator with Mama probably nearby. If I saw one, I'd run to your front door, where a tiger in the pit will then eat me.

When I first read your post I felt really peaceful. But then there was talk of creatures, tree poop and fire ants!

The Constant Complainer said...

Wow, that snake/bird picture was crazy. Poor little thing. LOL.

I'm going to check out "just Wandering Through..." so thanks for the referral.

I don't even have a porch, but hell, I'll take a picture of my small front stoop and enter anyway.

I'm just catching up on some reading. I hope you had a wonderful Memorial Day.

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