Playground of Life

It's been a year since my last post and it was a sad post in memory of a blogging friend. I will always remember my friend and her humor but it's time to put something else out here.

Evil Twin has been behaving but I think she is starting to feel the urge to wake up and raise Hell. I have been hearing some odd noises coming from her closet and the cat is making some not-so-secret nocturnal visits through the closet's cat door. I have confirmed that the cat is an alien so I'm getting very nervous as to what they're up to in there.

As for everything else, life continues to flow - like a seesaw.  As I get older, I feel like that teetle-totter is digging a hole when it comes down....or maybe there is an elephant on the other end. Speaking of seesaws, my cat is pretty darn smart:

 Seriously, life is pretty darn good. Oh, and no, that's not really my cat!

I hope your 2016 is off to a nice start. Maybe I won't wait another year before posting. I'll leave you with a favorite photo from our trip out west last year.

Reffie walks across an arch at Capitol Reef National Park. Evil Twin is somewhere.....

Happy 2016! Happy Martin Luther King Day! Happy Valentines' Day! Oh, never mind. Just be happy and find some humor in everything you do!

A Tearful Goodbye to my First Blogging Girl Crush

One of my first blogging friends, QuirkyLoon, aka, Sandie, is opening a six-pack of Diet Dr Pepper with the angels. Damn that cancer and its complications. A close friend of hers has more details here.

Quirky was the first person to comment on my blog way back in 2008!  We wrote a lot of posts back then, traded witty comments and became best blogging buddies.  Fun times! During the last few years as we've slowed down from the blogging hype, she dropped by my blog as often as she could. I knew she was fighting a battle.

I loved her insightful humor. She could make the worst experiences funny. She was a talented lady with a huge heart, strong of faith, loved by many, and she will be missed.

Goodbye Sweet Loon.  Make the angels laugh and sing some tunes with your own special words.

Sniff.

Sniff.

***Crickets***

The Year of the Gnome

It's a brand new year and all the elves sitting on shelves have been put away or burned for warmth or eaten by the dog or whatever.   Evil Twin is bored and driving me nuts so I found something to amuse her. I now introduce Gnome on the Run, the colorful garden creature that continually gets away from his evil captors, Gargoyles of the Pale.

Oh dear.  I see he's been captured.   I wonder where they are taking him?

 I'll send Evil Twin out to help him:

Yes, that's better.

Ahem.

Moving on....

It's been a bit shaky around here.  A nearby city (about 25 miles east) had NINE earthquakes yesterday.   Yeah, in Texas!  We've been hit by a few here and there and most folks blame the fracking, part of the process of extracting gas from the Barnett Shale.  I have yet to feel the earth move under my feet but I noticed a few items hanging more crooked than usual on my walls. 

Anything earth-shattering happening with you?

It's all about the hair

I found my blog.  It was just sitting here, all alone, waiting patiently for my return.   It's good to be back. At least there wasn't any nagging or whining from this bored blog, unlike Cat, where nagging and whining is an art that must be practiced over and over again.

Speaking of Cat, he sends his regards and complaints.  It's the usual - not enough food and the peoples not doing what he wants, whatever that is.

I've been a bit busy. There is a some serious remodeling going on around here and my arms nearly fell off from painting.  Photos coming at some point.

I've also been the lawn care person his summer and have spent plenty of time outside sans makeup and wearing old clothes.

So there I was, trying to unkink a wild hose in the front yard when our local weather girl drives by and shouts "Reffie, Reffie!"  Well, actually, she didn't call me that but you get the picture.  I know her from the gym so I've seen her without the makeup and styled hair from appearing on television, still looking gorgeous.  Life isn't fair.   Me?  Well, I kind of looked like this:

Wild-hair woman wearing weird clothes.  No, I wasn't wearing a dress and I don't have an ocean in my front yard. We do have moles and I was hoping one of the mole holes would open up and swallow me but no such luck.

"Yeah, hi there.....um....what's up?"

Later, I giggled at myself for caring. She is also a realtor and was driving around looking for lots for sale for a client.  She lives nearby.

Today I was out for a hilly run, dropping sweat here and there, and I encountered someone else I knew from the gym.  I did have some makeup on and was wearing running attire.  A hat contained the hair.  This time it was a guy and he was mowing his yard.  He stops the mower to chat with me.  I'm thinking "Wow, how nice" and then it occurred to me as I'm looping around his neighborhood that he approaches mowing just like he approaches his workout.  Do a bit, stop and text, do a bit, stop and chat, do a bit, take a phone call....   You get the picture.  People are funny.  He must have some serious ADD.

Yes, we are still mowing around here.  The grass is green and still growing as some of us here in north Texas have had enough rain and moderate summer temps to keep our yards alive and thriving.  I'm still in need of a predator for those grasshoppers, though.  They love my perennials.

That's enough for now.  I hope your summer was grand!

Chapter Three - The End?

I dreamed I was with Hubby and he was acting strange.  At some level, I was thinking this wasn't my husband.  What was my first clue?  The nose ring.  It had to be the nose ring.  When I asked how long he'd had it, he said for several months and I interrupted with I guess you've been taking it out every day before you came home, huh?  He sure didn't seem himself. Then it was the strange driving,  not able to stay in the lane, like something was taking over his body. 

Whoa!  Maybe I'm on to something here.  Is this a dream or some strange alien reality? 


Be quiet.  You will wake her.  We need to work quickly.  Let's test the device, that nose jewel we gave to the other one. Good.  She is primed and ready.  When the time comes, she'll know what to do.

As they left this last time, they forgot the most important thing - the cat's treat.  Missing his nom-nom, Oreo Kitty clawed the heck out of the two invaders.   Cat Scratch Fever may make us feel sick but it was a bit more than that for them.  They made it as far as the middle of New Mexico before the entire crew succumb to the illness.  There wasn't much left of them when their ship was found by that group of explorers. 

We'll never know what Reffie was supposed to do....or will we?

Chapter One

The Visitors (Chapter Two)



 

The Visitors - Chapter 1

It had been a strange month.  The weather got warmer and the weeds grew taller.  Reffie was busy with lawn and garden tasks and going to Spin class.   She told Cat and Evil Twin that she had been feeling odd, like her mind and body were somewhere else.  While mowing, she felt possessed, compelled to make strange crop circles.  The neighbors complained about the hideous yard and the bright lights and strange noises during the night.  Evil Twin smiled, nodded, and patted Reffie on the back for encouragement.

Last night, Reffie felt restless but tried to sleep anyway.....

Chapter 2

Stay tuned for Chapter 3.


Bawahahahaha!

Hint Fiction: The Visitors

They were quiet, their business done quickly, but something woke the geek girl, Reffie.

"Thank goodness that was only a dream!" 

Ah, a story within a story, leaving you wanting more.  Hint Fiction prompted by Jayne.  This blog has been ignored too long.  Join us and go see what the others have done over at Jayne's blog.

The Cat's Got Her Tongue

OK.  Maybe it's not a problem with her tongue but those undead folks that have been visiting here lately.  More on that later.

As usual, I'm not being properly cared for around here.  I got a box, though, and I really like it.

My throne, it awaits me, and sinks under my massiveness.

Oreo Kitty here, trying to scratch life into this blog.

I was noticing that the female, Reffie, has been ignoring this blog.  I tried to encourage her to write but she said some gibberish about being busy with races, home projects, and getting ready for spring. 

One done sprung

In between sleep times, I have to beg for food.  This is no life for a cat.  I want OUTSIDE where I know there are yummy things to munch like those silly birds and squirrels I chirp at from my window.  Reffie told me the squirrels were being silly, the boy squirrel was trying to climb on top of the girl squirrel and make little squirrels.  Well, that sounds goofy but I bet I could eat a little squirrel in one gulp.  I'd be happy with anything in my food bowl right now.  Sigh.

Oh, and those undead?  Reffie and Hubby watched a show called The Returned.  It is French with English sub-titles and is about these dead people that start to come back.  Oh, and there is sex and nudity.  Reffie enjoyed it.  Evil Twin (E.T.) is still trying to figure out how to bring back the dead.  As usual, she is blaming everything on Aliens.

Ironically, I am also E.T.

Snort.

** up comes a hairball from all that laughter **

I need a nap.  Reffie will clean up this mess....in more ways than one.


ET photo swiped from the Internet.  Reffie claims the other two.

28 Days of Writing - And then my head exploded

In the beginning, I was so innocent.  Then she said it is ONLY 28 days of writing.  It will be over before you know it.  It was like the Olympics, only without all the repetitive commercials or Bob's eye infection, or blabbering figure skating commentary....or Johnny Weir wearing Tara Lipinski's underwear.  They just kept going.  I was sad during the closing ceremony, though.   I loved that bear, that bunny, and that giant KITTY!  I was glad the kitty didn't try to chase the bunny.  Mine would have.

What was I saying?  Oh yeah.   Those cheesy folks were LIARS. It was 28 days of labor. Thank goodness I wasn't delivering a baby. On the other hand, it was 28 days of fun and laughter.   I enjoyed reading everyone's posts and those that wrote stories deserve all the gold in Canada.....or was that California?

Anyway, it had to be aliens that allowed me to post for 28 consecutive days. 

And then my head exploded and Cat ate my brains.

Sigh.

We were fooled in more ways than one.

Cat is a Zombie.

------------------

Some of the others may be Zombies today, too.  Enjoy the brainz.

Thanks to the Cheesy folks for hosting this challenge!

Photo borrowed from this site.

28 Days of Writing - How did you find out?

We've got everything ready, all of our ducks in a row.  Cat has groomed himself six times for the occasion.  Our guests know the drill - pick up Reffie for a birthday drink but instead drive to the bungee-jumping park.  Reffie will be so surprised.

I AM NOT GOING BUNGEE-JUMPING!

Hey, how did you know what we were planning?

Oh, please.  We are the same person, you dufus.

------------

Enough already.  ONE. MORE. DAY.

Sigh.  Where IS that bottle?

Go find out if these folks are plastered yet.

28 Days of Writing - Naked and Lost

Let's check in with Reffie and her hiking group one last time.  It looks like the folks in the tent are stirring......


Alice: It feels wonderful to have slept so well last night. 
Joe:  Ugh.  Keep your voice down.  My head hurts.

Alice:  Pffft.  You hogged that rum we had last night.  You have a hangover.
Joe:  Sigh.

Alice:  Um....anybody seen Reffie?

The others start looking around inside the tent, turning out sleeping bags, stepping on legos barefooted, and calling out to her.

Reffie?  REFFIE?

Reffie (or maybe it's Evil Twin) comes into the tent.  "What?"

Alice:  Um...
Joe:  Hubba.
Cat:  ME-OW!

Reffie:  Yeah, I'm naked and lost my clothes in a round of Texas Hold'm downstream.  Does anybody have something I can wear?  Oh, and where did that cat come from?

Our story ends as Reffie and her group sloshed their way down the mountain.  They found the nearest IHOP and ate their fill in pancakes.  As they checked into the Holiday Inn, they made sure there were no rattlesnakes in their rooms.

These people may or may not be nekkid today.

28 Days of Writing - Social Media

I've noticed I spend quite a bit of time using social media, specifically Facebook.  In general, I like it.  It's a good way to stay connected with people I don't see often and for me to be exposed to different types of people that I've "met" through blogging.   I enjoy seeing my friends' photos and knowing what's happening in their day-to-day lives.  A few jokes and videos here and there make it fun.

Of course there are things I find bothersome:

• I don't need to know about every meal you've had today.
• I don't need to know about your religious or political views over and over again.  In other words, that is primarily all that you post and it comes across as if you are trying to convert people to your way of thinking.
• I am somewhat bothered if I make an effort to comment or "like" your posts but you rarely do the same for me.
• I roll my eyes when you frequently use Facebook to promote your business interests on your personal page.
• I know your children/grandchildren are wonderful but I don't need to see photos of them every day.

I realize, though, that it's your personal page, and I respect that you can post what you want.  Just keep in mind that you risk losing your audience if you don't show some discretion.

Finally, Facebook is a tool.  Use it and don't let it use you.  Don't let it replace personal contact with real people.....only fake people.   Ha!

Um....Evil Twin?  What ARE you posting on my page?  Step away from the keyboard, NOW!

--------------

See what the others have to say about social media today.

28 Days of Writing - And then she said

And then she said "Go swim in your own pond!" and threw me and my fishing pole out.

What did you do?

I forgot Valentine's Day.

Ugh.  That's bad.

No.  I have an excuse.  Last year I brought her a huge mahi-mahi to make for our dinner and she spouted sewage at me for a month.

Um....most women don't like to cook on Valentine's Day.  They want to be wined and dined.

In our pond, it's too much whining and not enough dining.  Last year,  I drank all of the wine waiting on dinner.  I finally cooked the fish myself while she went to soak in the hot lake with her girlfriends.

Dude, you are still not getting it.  You need to show her you love and care for her.   Actually, you need to do that every day, not just on Valentine's Day.

Well, um.....Oh, I see.  Sigh.  I guess I could gut those fish I caught and clean up my messes in a more timely manner.

Now you're catching on a bit.

Ok.  Ok.  I'll make those repairs to our nest and replace all the wine I drank.

Good job.  I gotta go.  Waddle back to your little stream and give her a big feathery hug.

Quack.  Quack.

--------------

Spend some time with some of the other animals today.  It's survival of the fittest with this darn writing challenge.

28 Days of Writing - There are things

We rejoin Reffie and her group of hikers spending the night on the mountain.....

"Ok, folks, let's settle down.  It looks like Joe is already out for the night.  After his scare with what may or may not have been Bigfoot,  let's just let him sleep it off.

Thanks to Alice for finding that bottle of rum in her pack.  Most of you will be sleeping well.

Evil Twin, stop talking like a pirate!

Hiccup.

Excuse me.

It might be a rough night.  I'm hoping Bigfoot is also sleeping it off but we've all heard the expression there are things that go bump in the night.  Out here, I'm pretty sure it's not an urban legend.

If you here any bumps, thumps, or kerplunks out there, let me know.   Oh, and I'll need a volunteer to investigate, 'K?  You don't expect me to go out there, now do you?

----------------

I hope it's safer over at Nicky's today.

28 Days of Writing - It's only a dream

My weird dreams seem to get more weird as I get older.

What's with the multiple versions of the classic "fear of failure" or "lack of control" dream?

• You signed up for a college course but forgot to attend and it's time for the final. 
• You're out walking around without any pants.
• You really didn't graduate from college because there is a problem with your diploma.
• You're up and getting ready.  You're in the shower but the water is heavy.  You're trying to get dressed but your arms won't work right.
• The stairwell you are on becomes a technical climbing expedition and you just can't get to the exit door.

I've also been plagued with some strange nightmares.  My most recent night scare involved exploding fireballs headed towards the building I was working in, a building I have not been in since the late 90's.  I was using elevators and stairs during the attack. Weird stuff.  I woke up shaking, telling myself the classic "It's only a dream.  It's only a dream."  I certainly wanted to be back in Kansas with Toto.

I'm wondering if perhaps Evil Twin has anything to do with these dreams but I think that nightmare may have been the fault of a warm night and a hot cat snuggled against me.

Actually,  I have no clue.

Oh, and those stairs?  Maybe I watched this video too many times:

Stairway Illusion

------

Climb the stairway to heaven with the others today.

28 Days of Writing - Yes, I made that

Reffie, Cat, and Evil Twin are relaxing watching the Olympics.  Reffie remembers she needs to write something for "Yes, I made that".......


Reffie: What should we do for this prompt, you'll?

Cat:  Meow.

Evil Twin:  I think he wants to show you something he made in the litter box.

Reffie:  Ew.

Evil Twin:  I made this:

Reffie:  In your dreams.

Evil Twin:  Yeah, well, you can talk about it in a couple of days.  Dreaming is one of the prompts for this crazy writing challenge you're doing.

Reffie.  Ah, the writing challenge.  Good one.  Yes, I made that happen....so far.

Snort.

---------

Hop on over to Canada to see what the other participants made today.

28 Days of Writing - Chaos

"So, how did it go with the snakes, Joe?"

"Are you kidding?  It was awful, a complete cluster eff, er, I mean it was CHAOS.  Just as I was about to snare a rattler, this huge creature came out of the woods.  It was dripping wet and obviously hungry.  It was chasing a rabbit but the rabbit got away.  He saw my snake, grabbed it and bit off...."


**retching noises**


"Ok, my stomach feels better now. Let's just say we aren't having grilled rattlesnake tonight."

-------------

Oh my.  Poor Reffie, Joe, and the rest of that stranded hiking party.   I wonder what will happen to them next?

For more chaos, check in with the cheeses.

28 Days of Writing - Tastes like chicken

We join our heroes, Reffie and Evil Twin, on a mountain somewhere.  Reffie is leading a group of hikers.....somewhere.  And Evil Twin?  We aren't sure what has happened to her.

........

OK folks, it looks like we're stuck on this mountain overnight.  Let's get in the tent out of the rain so we can open our packs and turn out our pockets and see what we have for food tonight.

Thanks.

Wow.  This is an interesting pile of, er, stuff:

• $1.53 - I hope that's not all you have for my tip.
• 1 broken and crumbly granola bar - Ok, this looks promising.
• 3 used tissues - I sure hope that isn't from your last trip to the bushes, Joe.
• 2 dog biscuits - Well, um, Rover won't go hungry.
• Rover - No, we're not that desperate.  Keep him away from that granola bar.
• A pocket knife - Aha!

Here's the plan.  There is a reason this canyon is called Rattlesnake Canyon.  What do you think we've been hearing?  Joe, you're looking brave and I bet you're skilled with that knife.  You kill a few of those snakes.  The rest of us will see if we can get a fire going.

Cheer up, folks. They taste like chicken.

---------

More chickens are laying eggs here.

28 Days of Writing - Liars

When I was growing up, one of the worst things we could do was tell a lie.  That was very, very, BAD, and my brother and I were appropriately punished.  Well, the punishment worked.  I'm not much of a liar.

I'm not talking about white lies.  Sometimes, those are necessary in order to not hurt someone you care about or someone you need to respect, like a boss.  When your boss asks you if they look fat, what are you going to say?

Don't answer that.

The lies that people tell to cover up their mistakes are the ones that really get to me.  It bugs me that some people are not able to accept the consequences of their actions and lie in order to get out of trouble.

There are those that convince themselves that their perspective is truth.  I guess it is to them but it doesn't make it fact.

Enough of this serious stuff.  Let's find some funny.

One of the funniest lies I remember is from an episode of Red Dwarf where Lister is trying to teach Kryton to lie.

Hee Hee.  Stop hanging around on youtube and go check out the other liars.

28 Days of Writing - I faked it

Hm...."faking it" is not a strength for me.  Maybe I need to work on that.

Wait.  That could imply that everything I've written on this blog is true.  Ahem.  Well, ok, maybe I'm better at "faking it" than I thought.  When it comes to blogging, let's not call it "faking it".  How about embellishment?  Or exaggeration?    Yeah, that's better.

No, Evil Twin, I'm not misspelling "fake."  The post is not about "effing it", 'K?  I think that would be an easy post to write as I'm sure must people have wanted to say that about something in their lives at one point or another, usually involving an employer.

Most of us have also "faked it until we've made it" a time or two, knowing that we need to appear confident and "with it" when we really feel completely clueless and afraid.  I know I've had to do that a few times in my corporate days when I was standing up in front of group of people leading a IT requirements analysis session.  Not that I didn't have the skill, I just didn't have the confidence or was learning a new part of the business.  It still happens, occasionally, when I teach fitness classes, usually when I have to teach a different format or face a room full of cold stares when I'm subbing for a favorite instructor.

Oh, and I bet some of you think that Evil Twin is fake.  Well, er, maybe.  Then again, maybe not.

------

Find other fakes (not flakes) at Nicky's.